I am in the same kind of search. I have a 2 year old and a wife. I have been wanting to do some off camera flash for a while now. Speed and ease of use are huge when you are balancing keeping the kid happy, wife involved and engaged, and the photography equipment functioning. I have enjoyed the blog
Strobist: Lighting 101 and have found it to be very helpful. The author has a link for a light stand, umbrella, bracket, and corded flash sync for around $110. I might pull the trigger on that but am leaning towards a lumiquest softbox III and a way to mount a coldshoe to my camera tripod. Any recomendations on how to do that?