[mikemike]

As many people, such as Anne Frank, don't recognize that they are really Mormons until the temple baptizes them posthumously, many mormons don't realize how gay they are until someone sodomizes them posthumously.

I just converted George and Lenore Romney to gay, hopefully this will somehow prevent Mitt Romney from ever being born and we won't have to worry about him becoming president.

All Dead Mormons Are Now Gay

[kenafein]

Nice. I never understood the post-humorous conversions anyways. Doesn't everyone go to heaven according to the Mormon faith? Understandably it's not the 'good' heaven, but do they really think they'll be fooling the lord of Kolob?

[redrockcoulee]

As many people, such as Anne Frank, don't recognize that they are really Mormons until the temple baptizes them posthumously, many mormons don't realize how gay they are until someone sodomizes them posthumously.

I just converted George and Lenore Romney to gay, hopefully this will somehow prevent Mitt Romney from ever being born and we won't have to worry about him becoming president.

All Dead Mormons Are Now Gay

Mike

I know that you can baptise people figurely after they are dead using water etc. But is there not a law agaist sodomizing some one after they are dead? I would not make your deeds public if I was you

[Ratmagiclady]

Eh, you know, this is an amusing way to let the LDS know how what they do feels, but I'm not going to do it, for the same reason I find what it's spoofing pretty offensive: it's just too disrespectful of the ancestors to 'rewrite' them in that way, though I'm sure some of the actual dead gay Mormons might appreciate it.

Which does make me think, if the Mormons have postumously baptized the Founding Fathers, we could put them on this website, too, and then talk about how this nation was founded on dead, gay Mormon principles.

[Nesster]

nation was founded on dead, gay Mormon principles

There ya go! best post of the day and it's only 6AM

[Nesster]

Then there's this:
Mormon Baptism Targets Anne Frank -- Again

Radkey said she discovered that Annelies Marie "Anne" Frank, who died at Bergen Belsen death camp in 1945 at age 15, was baptized by proxy on Saturday. Mormons have submitted versions of her name at least a dozen times for proxy rites and carried out the ritual at least nine times from 1989 to 1999, according to Radkey. But Radkey says this is the first time in more than a decade that Frank's name has been discovered in a database that can be used both for genealogy and also to submit a deceased person's name to be considered for proxy baptism -- a separate process, according to a spokesman for the church. The database is only open to Mormons.

A screen shot of the database sent by Radkey shows a page for Frank stating "completed" next to categories labeled "Baptism" and "Confirmation," with the date Feb. 18, 2012, and the name of the Santo Domingo Dominican Republic Temple.

The name of Nobel Peace Prize winner Elie Wiesel was recently submitted to the restricted genealogy website as "ready" for posthumous proxy baptism, though the church says the rite is reserved for the deceased, and Wiesel is alive. Wiesel, a Holocaust survivor, was among a group of Jewish leaders who campaigned against the practice and prompted the 2010 pact by which the Mormon Church promises to at least prevent proxy baptism requests for Holocaust victims.

[ihasa]

it's just too disrespectful of the ancestors to 'rewrite' them in that way, though I'm sure some of the actual dead gay Mormons might appreciate it.

Plus the last thing I want when I get to gay heaven is to find the place full of Mormons....

[Ratmagiclady]

Plus the last thing I want when I get to gay heaven is to find the place full of Mormons....

Speaking of rewriting and erasure, though, and being dead: it's a poor thing to hope to outlive your parents just to avoid them pronouncing the body straight and Christian in front of some big crowd. And the LDS and others feign incomprehension about how anyone could *possibly* be offended by ritualized claiming of the dead as what they weren't. Y'know?


And the fact is, there *are* a lot of dead LGBT Mormons who were in just such a way, erased. Where I've been, a lot of our more colorful cases involved refugees from Utah, y'know? Kind of disproortionate for our region, really. Not that it don't happen among others.

[crewl1]

Feel free to single out any religious group for ridicule, just know that some members of said groups may be dear friends on this forum and your words may be offensive to them.

Hurtful and misinformed expressions of opinions towards any group may cause them to think of you differently.

If you consider yourself better than them because they do not think, act or look the same as you you should think again.

It is prejudicial to assume everyone of a certain race or creed is worthy of the negative stereotype promulgated by the masses.

Just sayin'.

[ihasa]

I do find it particularly hard to be sympathetic to the Mormon Church to be honest. I always thought their creed was bizarre, but the support for Prop8 was unforgivable. I don't find their 'posthumous conversion' troubling. They can 'convert' Anne Frank as many times as they want, if it makes them feel good, that's fine. It has no impact on anything whatsoever. Anne Frank is dead and whatever religion people choose to imaginarily bestow upon her in this world cannot reach her. It's simply not worth feeling 'offended' about.

[newmikey]

As many people, such as Anne Frank, don't recognize that they are really Mormons until the temple baptizes them posthumously, many mormons don't realize how gay they are until someone sodomizes them posthumously.

I just converted George and Lenore Romney to gay, hopefully this will somehow prevent Mitt Romney from ever being born and we won't have to worry about him becoming president.

All Dead Mormons Are Now Gay

Brilliant post AND absolutely great website! I do want to complain about some lacking functionality: I have worked hard at converting some of the dead but can find no way to see or print/publish a list of my hard work - that really needs to be taken care of or I refuse to convert any more mormons

Also, would there be any way to design some sort of bio-feedback device that plugs in to the site?

[mikemike]

I do find it particularly hard to be sympathetic to the Mormon Church to be honest. I always thought their creed was bizarre, but the support for Prop8 was unforgivable. I don't find their 'posthumous conversion' troubling. They can 'convert' Anne Frank as many times as they want, if it makes them feel good, that's fine.

The same week as prop 8 cleared a major hurdle (I don't remember if it was the vote or some court ruling), Joseph Smith's personal family bible went up for auction and I thought it would have been poetic justice if some rich gay person or group bought that bible and used it exclusively for conducting gay marriage ceremonies.

I'm not sure what the goal of the posthumous conversion thing is, if it is just a way to honor someone who the mormon church thinks was a great person then I am okay with it, but I think they should come up with a less abrasive name for it. Converting someone against their will is very offputting to the living members of that person's family and faith. I certainly think it is nicer than the Catholic church's rules on sainthood which would put Hitler as closer to being a saint than Anne Frank by merit of the fact that Hitler was a catholic. Honoring someone in a non-conversion way might also allow someone like Elie Wiesel to accept that honor instead of making him and his family stress about mormon goal tenders bothering them before the body is cold.

[mikemike]

Brilliant post AND absolutely great website! I do want to complain about some lacking functionality: I have worked hard at converting some of the dead but can find no way to see or print/publish a list of my hard work - that really needs to be taken care of or I refuse to convert any more mormons

Also, would there be any way to design some sort of bio-feedback device that plugs in to the site?

The site looks like a hastily put together joke, but I find it disturbing that you have a bio-feedback device to interface with your computer which might be relevant to this site's subject matter.

[Nesster]

I'm not sure what the goal of the posthumous conversion thing is, if it is just a way to honor someone who the mormon church thinks was a great person then I am okay with it, but I think they should come up with a less abrasive name for it.

The way I understand it, the purpose of posthumous conversion is to ensure all one's family, into the far past, can enjoy the benefit of Mormon Heaven together. In other words, there's a kind, sharing quality to it from certain angles.

Of course when we go back far enough all of us are related and thus eligible, if only we converted now or later. But we have to have a living descendant... who can identify us.

We lived in Salt Lake City for a while in the early 80s, it was a nice place to live. Our Mormon neighbors were the nicest, kindest people always willing to help out and include us. Once my wife made it clear she was Jewish and not interested, they didn't try to convert us - instead, she became a kind of curiosity, as most people had never seen a Jew. And Jews are, well, related to the Mormons. But genuinely nice people.

The relgion has its shadow sides of course; the more hierarchical and orthodox an institution is, the more suppression and other such there is, regardless of institution. Women in the religion don't have it so good: once divorced they are pretty much out of things, in Heaven they will be with their first husband, unless an unsealing ceremony is done.

[RoxnDox]

Of course, Stephen Colbert has taken care of the problem. He did a proxy posthumous circumcision the other night and now they're dead Jews instead of dead Mormons.

Jim