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02-27-2012, 08:54 AM   #16
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Ever since I stopped taking notice of the news, being happy is a lot easier.

Also, avoiding this forum and being out shooting helps a lot too. I mean, reading over and over and over again how bad Pentax is, isn't exactly hopegiving. The Pentaxians on this forum are more negative about Pentax then the people on the Canikon forums. This place is very bad for Pentax sales.

But it's true: I see a lot of unhappy people too. They're everywhere, it's an epidemic.

02-27-2012, 09:58 AM   #17
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I find it hard to maintain consistent happiness...just too many bumps in the road for that to happen, but I try to keep going and handle each bump as it comes. I do know a few people that are bubbly happy all the time in any circumstance....don't you just hate them!

I can't say I have any reason to complain, I am generally happy when I take a look at "what is" and compare it to how it "could be". It does help to keep things in perspective.........I have an older long time friend that is confined to a Nursing Home.....he is fine except he is near blind and must be there for his own safety. He has no family...only friends.......yes, it could always be worse....day after day of the same old nothingness of a Nursing Home. Yet, he maintains a good attitude and accepts his position, also realizing ......it could be worse.

Charlie, my friend.
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Regards!
02-27-2012, 12:47 PM   #18
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Eh, I dunno, Rupert, pretty hard for me to be right now: pain's been talking pretty hard for.. long enough I can't remember when this bout of it started, for one, but it's a pretty sad circumstance anyway, been sick, left alone at least for now in this place, trying to get by and finding it harder and harder, especially while being too ill to do much about it, even if the economy weren't still sucking,

So, no, I'm not exactly experiencing transports of glee at the moment.


Actually been rather sad: depressed, even: I'm far from people and places and the one I love, not making ends meet, and not completely having the option of turning off the news, given it bears so much on even my basic rights... (Not to mention the fact that there's little else for company most of my week: always nice to hear your state government and a political party debating how much to both hate you and make it worse for people in your position, too. ) It's frustrating, too, to be so ill, (I guess that's why they call it a 'disability,' ) and end up languishing in pain another month just cause the cost of everything going up or not being able to get through just cause of fee and rate increases, then any one little setback pushes one to the brink, little enterprises and dreams shrinking for want of a few bucks or a key thing.. and you're sitting or lying around trying to just keep up with daily life, never mind get a little bit on offense. Ending up having to eat your seed grain again and hold out for the next chance to try some more austerity, then try again with less nutrition, less money, less energy, more pain... And all the stress of that just making the pain worse.


It's hard to be happy when you're hurting all the time... Be at my age and still trying to get a start in life. Out of the remains of 'Almost made it. Again.' Make something out of what's left, (Or at least try to do something useful till, hopefully, my sweetie can get me out of here.) Everything against one, it seems, and even people in better positions can't make a go of it. Of course a lot of people are unhappy.

Even a lot of the castoff stuff rats like me can work with are being scraped bare by bigger scavengers and of course profiteers. You can judge a lot of things, civilizations included, by what comes out the tailpipe. It's gotten pretty thin.

But you have to try and be positive. (pissed-off will do in a pinch) Doesn't mean it *fixes* anything, but Gods know I've been fighting off the 'Just give-ups' again, a year after sweetie and I were still house-shopping a little, and I was trying to cobble together at least enough of what I need for work I can actually do to be ready for *that* kind of life,


Waking up crying a lot, actually, for the world and myself, but don't we all, every time we're born.

At least some of this pain has taken a particular form this week that enabled me to make some progress on physically-setting up my improvised darkroom. Still months behind on the last film I was going to do, just cause the latest upheaval has made it that hard to function. I never really recovered from the exhaustion of this last jump, really: the body's just not bouncing back. It's *bad,* man. Been here before, but it's bad. And the people who can help are being squeezed, too. I just had to apply for food stamps cause I was *just too sick* all this time to try and get in the black, when I had a little to work with. I don't even eat that much, but this *is* supposed to be the 'safety net.' And so much else is trying to push you through the gaps there.

Of course I'm not *happy.* I can't *do* much of anything. Even a lot of 'daring, risky,' and possibly-futile things, I can't do.

Little triumphs, though. I'm trying to get this place squared away like it should have been months ago before the winter chill set in.

Of course it could be worse. It's *been* worse for me. Used to be I could have done wonders with what I've got now. And I still can't keep up with the squeeze. This is the cheapest rent in town. Nowhere else to go but the vehicle I bought against that contingency. And Gods know how far I'd get at that point.

Last edited by Ratmagiclady; 02-27-2012 at 12:59 PM.
02-27-2012, 01:02 PM   #19
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RML, your situation and mine couldn't be much more disparate yet, inexplicably, I can't honestly say that on most days I'm not substantially happier than you seem to be.
I truly admire your ability to cope.


Last edited by Parallax; 02-27-2012 at 02:16 PM.
02-27-2012, 01:03 PM   #20
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I didnt read all the replies but heres my 2 cents.

Life is a series of ups and downs. The ups arent measurable without the downs. The old ying and yang thing. But thats all good. Its supposed to be a challenge. Anything worth it is a challenge. The day I can say Im truly happy is the day I can go home for good.
02-27-2012, 02:09 PM   #21
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QuoteOriginally posted by thebigcat Quote
I didnt read all the replies but heres my 2 cents.

Life is a series of ups and downs. The ups arent measurable without the downs. The old ying and yang thing. But thats all good. Its supposed to be a challenge. Anything worth it is a challenge. The day I can say Im truly happy is the day I can go home for good.
Personally, I tend to think that idea is kind of BS: comes from this strain on Manichaean dualism we're all raised with. Of course there's light and darkness, but each thing is *what it is.* You don't need pain to know joy, any more than you need joy to know pain. Then start playing comparison games. All pain really teaches you, if anything, is that some joys are actually unassailable and some pains are just pains. Neither's the more or less 'real' for presence or absence of the other. Rich people hurt, poor people hurt, healthy people hurt, sick people hurt. It's not a competition between opposites, really, it's just a bit of a thing about being present and feeling and doing and living.

I think sometimes rich people, still hurting, think that being poor or sick and hurting is some noble state that can be safely-ignored, since money and stuff doesn't 'make people happy' ...say dark is 'needed to see the bright,' etc. It's not really so. There's very real, practical, ahem, stuff, about either condition. People even saying 'it's good to suffer cause it produces faith (in others)' ...I don't really buy that.

Frankly, I think Lady spends enough time with me crying when I'd rather be experiencing and doing other things. I don't think you need to hurt to understand joy, any more than you need to run free in a bright meadow to understand what getting kicked really hard in the knee is... either way, it's about paying attention.

Even if this is a happy song:



Anyway, Jim, I'm not sure this constitutes 'coping,' but we do what we can. While we can. And happy doesn't come of eliminating all sorrows, it comes when you can feel it. Y'know?

Last edited by Ratmagiclady; 02-27-2012 at 06:14 PM.
02-27-2012, 02:13 PM   #22
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Sure...Blow holes in my dogma....Now I'm sad
02-27-2012, 03:41 PM   #23
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Sometimes yes. Mostly when I can manage to dump years of accumulated marital stress off my mind and get back to what I like to think of as my "natural" condition...

And no, I don't plan to dump the stress by dumping the spouse. Scuba is my best relief technique these days. On a good dive, I can get really into the zone and it's almost a meditation. On a bad dive, I am still having a lot of fun (and learning).


Jim

02-27-2012, 04:02 PM   #24
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most of these days, no. I'm unhappy with the direction so many people in this country want to take it. I'm unhappy with the greed and materialism that is spiraling out of control, I'm unhappy with the complete collapse of our education system. I'm unhappy about a lot of things, and while I try to not think about it at times, I find it weighing on my mind like a ton of bricks. within the past year, I have found that I am happy more often when I'm outside the country which has left me even more despaired in a lot of ways. as for my own personal issues, other than still trying to deal with the separation from my ex-fiancée nearly a year ago, and not being able to help waking up everyday still in love with someone who doesn't feel the same way, id say I'm otherwise doing ok. so I guess I don't have too much to complain about in all reality, so I try not to. I'm in the final stages of preparing for my month long overseas vacation in april though, so that is keeping me happy here lately. I have no idea why I have even shared any of this.
02-27-2012, 05:46 PM   #25
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It's good to share.....therapeutic maybe?

For those a little on the down side, Otis asked me to shoot this a few minutes ago as a reminder that there is always sunshine just under the clouds......he say's it's that way in life too. I never argue with Otis.....

Clouds over the Woods of Otis
[IMG] [/IMG]

Regards
02-27-2012, 07:07 PM   #26
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QuoteOriginally posted by Rupert Quote
It's good to share.....therapeutic maybe?

For those a little on the down side, Otis asked me to shoot this a few minutes ago as a reminder that there is always sunshine just under the clouds......he say's it's that way in life too. I never argue with Otis.....

Clouds over the Woods of Otis

Regards
Ah, that Otis. Do say hi for me. . Of course, with all the freak sun-sensitivities, I don't equate 'clouds' with 'sadness,' quite so much, myself. Sunlight's nice, but sometimes makes ow. There's a new brood of young squirrels about here, if I didn't mention: among some stuff I'm pretty determined to get off to where it's going by the first of the month is a long ol' lens that I might just try grabbing a couple of shots with if I'm up to it in the morning. (It's been held-up mostly for want of an appropriate sized box and my attention: stupid little things become challenging sometimes. )


Sorry to hear about your friend, by the way, (That's actualy a pretty compelling shot, if you look at it a while,) ..I've become pretty acutely aware again just lately of what it's like not to be able to take care of onesself so well, but that's cause we're social creatures, not like, made to be solitary consumers and stuff. As humans, we're kind of made to take care of each other, y'know? If someone else in the tribe can do in minutes what takes me hours or I can't do, then that leaves me more time to help others with what I *can* do.

Maybe your friend Charlie there could find himself useful to yourself, y'know, Rupert, rather than the both of you just saying 'It could be worse' and trying to seem all stoic about it or anything. And vice versa. Feeling useless isn't a good place for anyone to be, y'know?
02-27-2012, 07:25 PM   #27
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QuoteOriginally posted by Ratmagiclady Quote
.......And happy doesn't come of eliminating all sorrows, it comes when you can feel it. Y'know?
I like that.
02-27-2012, 08:11 PM   #28
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Ratlady.....you have to know I would love some young Squirrel shots....I still cherish that one you loaned me....one of my favorites of all time in fact. If you can get some more, do it! Do it for Otis!

Charlie and me help each other quite often.....I visit him every few weeks for an afternoon, and we sit around and lie to each other and challenge ourselves to not get caught. We're both pretty good, so it is usually a draw.

Regards!
02-27-2012, 09:27 PM   #29
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QuoteOriginally posted by bigdavephoto Quote
Hell, I'll be the first one to come right out and say it, I'm not happy. Right now I really don't have a reason to be happy. Right now I have no job because the last place I was working for had to let me go. TBH it was my fault I am out of work, but the place I worked for didn't want to see the fact that I was having a small health problem and they wouldn't give me another chance.

I figured this would give me a chance to do something different, and I have had a lot of people tell me that I am a good photographer, so I thought I could sell some of my pictures. I set up a facebook page so people could see my photographs and maybe buy some prints. Yeah right. I also got some note card/greeting card stock and printed out some cards. So far, one place has actually agreed to display and sell them and that was over a month ago. Stopped in and checked the stock the other day, One card has sold.

I've also been doing the unemployment thing, but a lot of good that's doing me. Have been signed up for almost a month and have not seen one cent from them yet.

Almost makes me want to just throw away my cameras and everything else I own and move back to the Rocky Mountains and find an old cave to move into and say the hell with the world.

If anybody wants to take a look at that facebook page it's

facebook.com/bigdavephotography
Sorry to hear about all this BD. It's a good idea to try a 6 week business plan course I feel.. I don't know if the unemployment people over there are into all of that but it's worth a go. Knowing how to put together a proper business plan tends to get you thinking a bit more objectively about what you are trying to achieve beyond just making a casual $ here and there. Or you could always sell up and move to Australia.. we'll look after you. seriously.
02-27-2012, 09:45 PM   #30
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I am generally a miserable SOB.. which is probably why I am alone these days.. The world can make me unhappy when countries still destroy each other for resources and the way people kill each other for having a different point of view can too. The way we're using up this world and turning it into a pile of shit doesn't help either.. turning off the news might make you happy but when that shit hits the fan, then you'll have no choice but to pay attention anyway.

I find that exercise, meditation, playing guitar, doing photography, cooking, washing the dishes, and loving my cat helps me feel better in every moment of my day. But it is a balancing act that you have to be aware of as making yourself suffer emotionally, because of the way the world is, is also no answer either - your inner life needs to be free of any of these things and that's a choice. It's a serious skill that takes people a lifetime to master in many cases. If you identify with happiness then you MUST identify with all other emotions. Riding the wave is all there really is and being aware of the way you respond to it through both your expectations and your perceptions tend to determine the flavor of the experience. That is not to say that shit doesn't happen though.

Pardon my French (apologies to any froggies in here)

Last edited by bossa; 02-27-2012 at 10:37 PM.
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