Forgot Password
Pentax Camera Forums Home
 

Reply
Show Printable Version Search this Thread
10-12-2012, 06:01 AM   #1
Veteran Member
MRRiley's Avatar

Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Sterling, VA, USA
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 6,276
Bullying has got to stop

First off... I do not know the young lady in this story, but her situation is sadly typical of thousand of young people every day in this country and around the world.

Bullied Canadian teen leaves behind chilling YouTube video - CNN.com

QuoteQuote:
(CNN) -- Her YouTube video started out innocently enough. The Canadian teen, her face obscured from the camera, held a stack of cards each filled with messages in black marker.

"I've decided to tell you about my never ending story," the card in Amanda Todd's hands read.

At this point the viewer may have no idea that they are about to be led on the most agonizing journey, one that pushed the premier of British Columbia to issue a stern warning against bullying, a journey that has birthed a Facebook page with thousands of people commenting many offering condolences.

In the soundless, black and white video, the teen showed one card after another. Each card painfully sinking the viewer deeper into the anguish too many teens have experienced.

...

The last cards say simply: "I have nobody. I need someone. My name is Amanda Todd."

On Wednesday, Amanda Todd's body was found in her home, police in the Vancouver-area city of Coquitlam said. She took her own life.

She was 15.
Such a waste... Suicide, legally speaking, is solely the responsibility of the person committing it, however the bullies, all of them, who led Amanda to this tragic decision should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law possible. These not so innocent children, and the adults who enable or overlook their bad behavior, should be held responsible to at least some degree!

Stop Bullying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A father thankful that his own children survived the gauntlet of public school bullies...

10-12-2012, 06:04 AM   #2
Banned




Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Charleston & Pittsburgh
Photos: Albums
Posts: 1,683
Plus there's the cases where people were bullied to the breaking point. The school shootings in Colorado a few years back were directly attributed to this as one of the prime causes. And as we'll eventually discover in the Colorado movie theater shootings; it will play a major contributing factor as well.

And that's just the ones that make the headlines. There are many each and every day that rarely make the headlines
10-12-2012, 06:13 AM - 1 Like   #3
Veteran Member
ihasa's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: West Midlands
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 2,064
The bullying was obviously appalling and unacceptable, but I'd just like to say to parents 'do not give your 7th grade daughter unfettered internet access with a webcam'. And generally, limit your children's unsupervised access to the internet. Make them go out and play with their friends.
10-12-2012, 07:02 AM   #4
Pentaxian
Clavius's Avatar

Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: De Klundert
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 4,122
QuoteOriginally posted by ihasa Quote
The bullying was obviously appalling and unacceptable, but I'd just like to say to parents 'do not give your 7th grade daughter unfettered internet access with a webcam'. And generally, limit your children's unsupervised access to the internet. Make them go out and play with their friends.
I think it's thanks to the anonymity of the internet that bullying, and being bullied, is now openly discussed and that something is being done about it. The internet has a lot of disadvantages, I admit, but this openness is an obvious advantage.

Teens were bullied beyond insanity before the internet even existed. Restricting the internet will not give people suffering from it any relief. And forcing your bullied children to "go out and play with their friends" whilst they don't have any, makes the parents a bully themselves.

10-12-2012, 07:32 AM   #5
Veteran Member




Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Iowa
Photos: Albums
Posts: 2,269
QuoteOriginally posted by Medium FormatPro Quote
The school shootings in Colorado a few years back were directly attributed to this as one of the prime causes.
The Columbine school shooters were not bullying victims, though it's easy to see how bullying can easily lead to something like that happening.

What's especially tragic about bullying is that it makes kids think that their lives will always like it is when they're being bullied. They will always be ostracized and harassed, that no one will ever love them, no one will ever be their friend, that their lives are worthless and they would be better off dead. When you get older, you discover that's not the case, but some of these kids don't get the chance.

QuoteOriginally posted by Clavius Quote
Teens were bullied beyond insanity before the internet even existed. Restricting the internet will not give people suffering from it any relief. And forcing your bullied children to "go out and play with their friends" whilst they don't have any, makes the parents a bully themselves.
Yep...

In the pre-internet era I was a kid... and it flat out sucked. I moved around a lot as a kid. I don't think I ever went to the same school more than one year, and sometimes it would be two or three in the span of one grade. All schools don't teach quite the same curriculum, so when you move around all the time, you're constantly playing catch up and trying to assimilate. I was always the new kid. I got a ton of crap from the other kids, and even some teachers. By 8th grade, I had an ulcer. I started thinking about suicide around the 5th grade or so. When I was around 15, I swallowed all of the pills I found in the medicine cabinet while my parents were gone. If there had been a gun in the house I would have probably used it, but it was the only method I could think of at the time. As luck would have it, the particular cocktail I swallowed only made me throw up a lot, very soon.

A few months later, I met the girl I later married. January 20th will be our 25th anniversary. I've had the same job which I enjoy for over 20 years, good friends, and most importantly my wife, whom I still love to hang out with as much as possible. I wish I could find these kids and tell them to just hang in there, that it will get better. Of course, whether they would listen is another matter.

In my opinion, the single most important lesson you can teach your kids is that everything you do affects others. And it's your responsibility as a person to try your best to make it a positive effect. Anything else a kid can learn is less important than that.

Peace.
Bobbo.
10-12-2012, 08:52 AM   #6
Veteran Member
Jasvox's Avatar

Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 3,110
Bullying begins and ends with the parents. Parents fail to set a quality example and be involved with their children's lives have no one to else to blame if their kid turns out to be a bully or develops any kind of negative personality characteristics.

Parents.

Jason

PS...is this a political or religious discussion?
10-12-2012, 09:55 AM   #7
Veteran Member
MRRiley's Avatar

Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Sterling, VA, USA
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 6,276
Original Poster
QuoteOriginally posted by Jasvox Quote
Bullying begins and ends with the parents. Parents fail to set a quality example and be involved with their children's lives have no one to else to blame if their kid turns out to be a bully or develops any kind of negative personality characteristics.

Parents.

Jason

PS...is this a political or religious discussion?
Yes the parents have a role, but the bullies themselves bear the ultimate responsibility for their despicable actions.

And it is a political discussion since the solution is ultimately political in nature... the development of concrete consequences for bullying behavior. Bullying should be considered a crime of assault or coercion and these little monsters should not get away with it just because they are minors.

Mike
10-12-2012, 10:38 AM   #8
Veteran Member
magkelly's Avatar

Join Date: May 2010
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 5,905
QuoteOriginally posted by Clavius Quote
Teens were bullied beyond insanity before the internet even existed. Restricting the internet will not give people suffering from it any relief. And forcing your bullied children to "go out and play with their friends" whilst they don't have any, makes the parents a bully themselves.
It's not just teens. School bullying starts in grade school and usually escalates as kids get older. As a kid I had a few friends in the neighborhood, mostly because my Mom instigated play dates with new girls my age as they moved there, but it was a long time before I ever made any at school and most of the time it was the other "freaks" that befriended me not anyone considered popular. I was literally tormented from grade school to high school to the point where I felt like Stephen King's Carrie. I was so filled with rage and despair that I had to finally leave my own high school and finish school in an adult high school program for fear I'd kill myself or someone else. They did everything just short of the pig's blood thing. They threatened me, they stole from me, they called my house incessantly. The internet wasn't even a thing back then or likely they'd have just used that too and I'd have probably broken.

I was stronger than they were but it was not easy surviving that kind of torture every single day. The teachers really didn't help much with two notable exceptions. The principle at my one school literally laughed at my Mom and Dad for insisting he stop it. He said it was impossible and that kids would be kids and that I needed to grow a pair figuratively speaking of course because I was a whiny girl. In the meantime I had six girls threatening to kick my ribs in and blocking my way home after school more often than not and two boys in my English class that would not keep their hands to themselves.

One of them shoved me into a locker and felt up my breasts between classes. He got kneed for his efforts though not nearly as hard as I would have liked. The other put his hand between my legs when I stood to go to the black board. I flat out slugged him. To her credit the teacher took my side on that one. She saw it and refused to punish me even though the principal insisted I should be. It was sexual and regular harassment both verbal and physical but most of the time no one did anything.I used to sit there all day and not go to the bathroom because I was afraid that if they did I'd either get my head dunked in the toilet or those boys would do far worse than grope me.

I was terrified for more than 9 years going to school. Every day was horrible. There was other stuff going on at home too. My parents were not happy and there was arguing and chemical abuse so there was no respite when I got home either. It's still a wonder to me that I ever made it alive to adulthood. I have diagnosed PTSD because of all that stuff. No joke. I've been through therapy and I'm past most of it but every now and again something will happen and it's like I'm right back there in my head, feeling scared and angry and I still have nightmares about it all the time. No amount of therapy has ever been able to make those go away.

I speak in a local program about it. I want other kids to understand that what they are doing can have life long repercussions. That it's not just kid's games. One of the places I speak is my old high school. One of the staff there was one of the kids that tormented me. First time I spoke that staff member ended up in tears apologizing. It's not easy getting up on that stage talking about it. It's not easy typing it here. I'm sitting here eyes tearing and shaking a bit and it's much worse when I have to get up in front of a couple hundred kids in a gym or auditorium and talk about it. Particularly when it's those schools, the ones I went to middle and high school. Lots of really bad memories walking with me in those halls. But I do it. I have to. I'm walking proof of what happens to kids who are bullied and that you can actually survive it.

I've had several kids come up to me after, either kids who were bullied or who bully. They talk to me and tell me their own stories. They need someone to listen so I listen. What I hear, it just chills me sometimes. Kids have always bullied, that's true but living in this digital age, it's ever so much worse in some ways. What used to be about one school campus is now out all over to every school in the area via the internet. You're getting it from kids you don't even know and it's a lot more sexually oriented these days than not, the harassment. Kids get violent and tape it to show on You Tube. You're called a slut or worse constantly by people who have never even met you. It's still like what I experienced only the pressure is even worse. You have kids telling you to commit suicide online. It's unbelievable how mean the kids can be to each other.

I think it's just now starting the public awareness of the problem. Me, I am fully behind making kids who bully face up to what they are doing and yes, I do feel they should bear the results legally of what they are doing. I want them in detention, expelled, in juvenile or civil court if necessary to make them stop. If it prevents suicides like this or people having to live with PTSD like me than I think it will be worth it.

10-12-2012, 11:21 AM   #9
JHD
Veteran Member




Join Date: Jan 2010
Photos: Albums
Posts: 1,407
Here's the video the Vancouver teen posted... Video: Amanda Todd

IMO people who bully others to the point where the victim takes their life should be charged with murder.
10-12-2012, 04:01 PM   #10
Veteran Member
magkelly's Avatar

Join Date: May 2010
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 5,905
Murder is picking up a weapon and doing it yourself. Suicide is not murder technically. But provoking it is manslaughter and should be treated as such, absolutely.
10-12-2012, 05:41 PM   #11
JHD
Veteran Member




Join Date: Jan 2010
Photos: Albums
Posts: 1,407
QuoteOriginally posted by magkelly Quote
Murder is picking up a weapon and doing it yourself. Suicide is not murder technically. But provoking it is manslaughter and should be treated as such, absolutely.
I don`t know how things work in the USA, but here in Canada if someone hires someone else to do the dirty work, both parties are equally guilty of murder.

In any case I think when a person is driven to despair and takes their own life due to external imposed forced cruelty, that should be tantamount to murder.
10-12-2012, 07:46 PM   #12
Veteran Member
magkelly's Avatar

Join Date: May 2010
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 5,905
Hiring someone to commit murder is just using the person as a tool to commit the deed. Goading someone to suicide is horrible but it's not technically murder though morally it might as well be. But a good legal case can be made I think for manslaughter and felony harassment.
10-14-2012, 03:15 AM   #13
Veteran Member
ihasa's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: West Midlands
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 2,064
QuoteOriginally posted by Clavius Quote
I think it's thanks to the anonymity of the internet that bullying, and being bullied, is now openly discussed and that something is being done about it. The internet has a lot of disadvantages, I admit, but this openness is an obvious advantage.

Teens were bullied beyond insanity before the internet even existed. Restricting the internet will not give people suffering from it any relief. And forcing your bullied children to "go out and play with their friends" whilst they don't have any, makes the parents a bully themselves.
Access to the internet is great and a good thing, I am not arguing about that. What I am saying is that this girl's problems began when she started being groomed by dirty old men, and ended up being blackmailed by them. This is a separate issue entirely from the bullying which drove her to take her own life, but you cannot ignore the role which those events played in this sad story arc. I think parents are hopelessly naive about what their children could get up to on the internet. They think that if they are in their bedrooms, they are safe; when in fact in many ways they would be safer walking the streets.

Last edited by ihasa; 10-14-2012 at 03:20 AM.
Reply

Bookmarks
  • Submit Thread to Facebook Facebook
  • Submit Thread to Twitter Twitter
  • Submit Thread to Digg Digg
Tags - Make this thread easier to find by adding keywords to it!
amanda, card, cards, children, journey, people, video, viewer, youtube
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Republicans like Christie's bullying more than they dislike his jobs failure boriscleto General Talk 3 08-22-2012 12:38 PM
Michigan Passes Anti-Bullying Law, except... deadwolfbones General Talk 48 11-10-2011 03:58 PM
Misc When i say stop it means stop ! deadprez Post Your Photos! 3 08-02-2011 07:38 AM
Streets Stop right here ASa Photo Critique 3 02-28-2011 04:20 AM
Interesting book review about bullying Ratmagiclady General Talk 36 04-05-2010 07:02 AM



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:41 PM. | See also: NikonForums.com, CanonForums.com part of our network of photo forums!
  • Red (Default)
  • Green
  • Gray
  • Dark
  • Dark Yellow
  • Dark Blue
  • Old Red
  • Old Green
  • Old Gray
  • Dial-Up Style
Hello! It's great to see you back on the forum! Have you considered joining the community?
register
Creating a FREE ACCOUNT takes under a minute, removes ads, and lets you post! [Dismiss]
Top