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12-24-2021, 05:33 PM - 3 Likes   #4576
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My favourite “Knock,knock” joke is when you tell another person to start it,give it a try this Xmas!

12-25-2021, 05:19 AM   #4577
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If this offends anyone, I'm sorry - but this is the Joke Thread ! :

12-25-2021, 07:54 AM - 2 Likes   #4578
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QuoteOriginally posted by 35mmfilmfan Quote
If this offends anyone, I'm sorry - but this is the Joke Thread ! :

Roaring Jelly - Poor Little Turkey - YouTube
Love it.My football team’s fans sing a song about our rivals to the same tune:

“He’s only a poor little budgie
His feathers all tattered and torn,
He started to sing
So we filled the #*^¥ in
And now he don’t sing any more!”

Any fans of Ipswich Town or Norwich City will know it.Norwich fans sing equally “offensive” songs about us,but it’s all part of the good humoured rivalry!!
12-25-2021, 10:05 AM - 2 Likes   #4579
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QuoteOriginally posted by timb64 Quote
My favourite “Knock,knock” joke is when you tell another person to start it,give it a try this Xmas!
My favorite knock knock is the one about WWIII:

Knock knock

Who's there?


..........................................(silence)

12-25-2021, 04:12 PM - 3 Likes   #4580
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Knock knock.

Who's there?

No, who's on first..
12-26-2021, 05:29 AM   #4581
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12-26-2021, 11:11 PM - 1 Like   #4582
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Martin Stu, your pictorial jokes are very good.
Who is the cartoonist?

12-27-2021, 08:11 AM - 4 Likes   #4583
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QuoteOriginally posted by rod_grant Quote
Martin Stu, your pictorial jokes are very good.
Who is the cartoonist?
I am pleased to introduce this cartoonist.


Herluf Bidstrup - was a Danish cartoonist and illustrator. He is a very wonderful cartoonist, he drew cartoons on a variety of topics (mostly everyday, but also social and anti-war), but since his youth fell on the Second World War, as a result he became an opponent of the war (and this was reflected in some of his cartoons of anti-war and anti-militarist orientation). During the German occupation of Denmark during World War II, he lived in the United States and at one time was one of the most popular and well-known Danish artists abroad.
Many of his drawings are freely available.

success

Last edited by Martin Stu; 12-27-2021 at 09:39 AM.
12-27-2021, 10:46 AM - 1 Like   #4584
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QuoteOriginally posted by rod_grant;5.80859:
Martin Stu, your pictorial jokes are very good.
Who is the cartoonist?
I agree, I've found them quite amusing in a unique and interesting manner. Thank you for sharing them and please continue sharing.
12-27-2021, 01:47 PM - 6 Likes   #4585
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A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb.”

“Well put,” the judge replied. “Using your logic, I sentence the defendant’s arm to one year’s imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses.”

The defendant smiled. With his lawyer’s assistance, he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.
12-27-2021, 02:49 PM - 6 Likes   #4586
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QuoteOriginally posted by bertwert Quote
A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb.”

“Well put,” the judge replied. “Using your logic, I sentence the defendant’s arm to one year’s imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses.”

The defendant smiled. With his lawyer’s assistance, he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.
It didn't help my buddy's case when the judge told him it was a $100 fine for speeding and he told the judge; "You can't get blood out of a turnip."
The judge replied: "No, but I can put a turnip in jail."
12-28-2021, 01:41 AM   #4587
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QuoteOriginally posted by robtcorl Quote
It didn't help my buddy's case when the judge told him it was a $100 fine for speeding and he told the judge; "You can't get blood out of a turnip."
The judge replied: "No, but I can put a turnip in jail."
Now that was a turnip for the booked !

(Sorry)
12-28-2021, 05:22 AM - 2 Likes   #4588
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It seems he miscalculated a bit


QuoteOriginally posted by Photos-by-Chas Quote
Thank you for sharing them and please continue sharing.
Okay
12-28-2021, 11:18 AM - 1 Like   #4589
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Resonates neatly with this :


and this somewhat longer version :

12-28-2021, 02:35 PM - 1 Like   #4590
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Hoffnung was the original, and very funny with it!
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