Forgot Password
Pentax Camera Forums Home
 

Reply
Show Printable Version Search this Thread
09-21-2018, 01:43 PM - 2 Likes   #1126
Loyal Site Supporter
Loyal Site Supporter
WPRESTO's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 36,826
Accountant to client: I can save you a bundle on taxes if you're willing to risk a little jail time.

Man to tax agent: You mean I have to pay taxes on money that I've already spent?

Tax agent to man called in for an audit: Relax, The worst that could happen to you already did.

Lady driver to highway patrol man: How could I drive 75 miles an hour when I've only been on the road for ten minutes?

09-22-2018, 04:04 AM   #1127
Loyal Site Supporter
Loyal Site Supporter




Join Date: Jul 2012
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 7,994
QuoteOriginally posted by serothis Quote
If you poured that beer into a wooden cup would it become a "log"er?


---------

If Thailand ever got into a war we would have to call them the Empire because all their pilots would be thai fighters

Duh!!! I must be on a slow bell this morning. I do not get it. Something to do with Star Wars?

TT
09-22-2018, 05:22 AM   #1128
Loyal Site Supporter
Loyal Site Supporter
WPRESTO's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 36,826
QuoteOriginally posted by Tonytee Quote
Duh!!! I must be on a slow bell this morning. I do not get it. Something to do with Star Wars?

TT
In the the very first "Star Wars" movie, the heroes flew in craft called "X-wing fighters" and the villains, The Empire, flew pod-like craft called "tie-fighters," hence the homonyms "tie" and "Thai."
09-22-2018, 11:56 AM   #1129
bxf
Pentaxian
bxf's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Lisbon area
Posts: 1,287
QuoteOriginally posted by normhead Quote
The Germans capture a Britisdh officer during WWII. They are interrogating but all he says is "Tick, tick tick."
The German interrogator finally loses it and says "we have ways of making you tock.
Forgive me, but I feel compelled to make a slight modification:

"Ve haf vays to make you tok"!

Sounds more appropriate, no?

09-23-2018, 10:01 AM - 2 Likes   #1130
Pentaxian
Site Supporter
normhead's Avatar

Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Near Algonquin Park
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 31,941
QuoteOriginally posted by bxf Quote
Forgive me, but I feel compelled to make a slight modification:

"Ve haf vays to make you tok"!

Sounds more appropriate, no?
I'm a quarter German, Tess is half German, we always thought we'd run for the local Council with the slogan "Vee, Haf a Vision for Vhitney."
09-23-2018, 11:25 AM - 1 Like   #1131
Loyal Site Supporter
Loyal Site Supporter




Join Date: Jul 2012
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 7,994
QuoteOriginally posted by WPRESTO Quote
Accountant to client: I can save you a bundle on taxes if you're willing to risk a little jail time.

Man to tax agent: You mean I have to pay taxes on money that I've already spent?

Tax agent to man called in for an audit: Relax, The worst that could happen to you already did.

Lady driver to highway patrol man: How could I drive 75 miles an hour when I've only been on the road for ten minutes?

Those are good ones. This is a true story. Many years ago when I was working for a Tax Preparer, I had one client come in who had been on unemployment for the better part of the year. He actually asked me how much will he be getting for a refund. It is comical, but unfortunately very true.

TT
09-24-2018, 06:50 AM   #1132
Pentaxian
jack002's Avatar

Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Missouri
Photos: Albums
Posts: 302
QuoteOriginally posted by serothis Quote
If you poured that beer into a wooden cup would it become a "log"er?

---------

If Thailand ever got into a war we would have to call them the Empire because all their pilots would be thai fighters
That would be a SIN
09-24-2018, 10:34 PM   #1133
Site Supporter
Site Supporter




Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Conroe, TX USA
Posts: 410
K-1 mk ll

Don't know if this is a joke or not but if you use Roman numerals, Pentax K-1 mk ll is Pentax Kill ! Look out !

RONC

09-25-2018, 05:56 AM   #1134
Veteran Member




Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Medellín
Posts: 644
QuoteOriginally posted by rechmbrs Quote
Don't know if this is a joke or not but if you use Roman numerals, Pentax K-1 mk ll is Pentax Kill ! Look out !

RONC
It's a stretch. It would be Kiii… ki do you love me? Are you riding?
Say you’ll never ever leave from beside me
‘Cause I want ya, and I need ya
And I’m down for you always.
Now we just need a KB to continue the lyrics.

09-25-2018, 09:33 AM   #1135
Pentaxian




Join Date: May 2016
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 541
QuoteOriginally posted by Tonytee Quote
Duh!!! I must be on a slow bell this morning. I do not get it. Something to do with Star Wars?

TT
QuoteOriginally posted by WPRESTO Quote
In the the very first "Star Wars" movie, the heroes flew in craft called "X-wing fighters" and the villains, The Empire, flew pod-like craft called "tie-fighters," hence the homonyms "tie" and "Thai."
I'm not that old am I?

QuoteOriginally posted by jack002 Quote
That would be a SIN
It's a bit of a tangent, but I guess a wooden beer stein would impart too much flavor and mask the flavor of the beer.
09-25-2018, 10:26 AM   #1136
Veteran Member




Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Medellín
Posts: 644
QuoteOriginally posted by serothis Quote
I'm not that old am I?



It's a bit of a tangent, but I guess a wooden beer stein would impart too much flavor and mask the flavor of the beer.
Well, beer used to be stored in wooden barrels, so no fear of wood there. I bet if you go looking for it, you can find a small brewery somewhere doing something with wood, like it is done with scotch and other spirits. If not, there's your marketing idea.

09-25-2018, 10:32 AM   #1137
Veteran Member




Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Medellín
Posts: 644
And for the sake of it, here's some Hägar for ya!

09-25-2018, 11:01 AM   #1138
Pentaxian




Join Date: May 2016
Photos: Gallery | Albums
Posts: 541
QuoteOriginally posted by torashi Quote
Well, beer used to be stored in wooden barrels, so no fear of wood there. I bet if you go looking for it, you can find a small brewery somewhere doing something with wood, like it is done with scotch and other spirits. If not, there's your marketing idea.
Wine is stored in barrels but I can't say I've ever seen a wooden wine...cup? Chalice? Goblet?
09-25-2018, 03:08 PM - 1 Like   #1139
Pentaxian
timb64's Avatar

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Out in the sticks,Suffolk,UK(or SE Asia,if I'm lucky!)
Photos: Gallery
Posts: 5,895
A man approaches an old lady on a park bench with a dog sitting at her feet. "Is your dog friendly?" He enquires
"Oh,yes" Replies the old dear.
The man goes to pet the dog and nearly gets his hand bitten off.
"I thought you said your dog was friendly" he muttered
"That's not my dog" replied the lady.
09-26-2018, 12:57 AM   #1140
Pentaxian




Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Romania
Posts: 11,501
QuoteOriginally posted by Jim Dandy Quote
What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill.

"Here come the elephants over the hill."

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill, wearing sunglasses.

Nothing, he didn't recognize them.
What did Tarzan say when he saw the giraffes coming over the hill?

"You fooled me once with your disguises..."
Reply

Bookmarks
  • Submit Thread to Facebook Facebook
  • Submit Thread to Twitter Twitter
  • Submit Thread to Digg Digg
Tags - Make this thread easier to find by adding keywords to it!
antonio, baby, church, coffin, community, course, crowd, dad, doctor, drop, friend, front, god, hands, house, jeff, joker, land, mouth, navy, notice, poland, post, redneck, son, spade, sun, window, woman, world
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Where is the annual Pentax FF April fool joke? LFLee Pentax Full Frame 27 04-04-2014 03:48 AM
Misc Batman : The Killing Joke 6BQ5 Post Your Photos! 7 02-24-2014 01:58 PM
Joke Thread! Gooshin General Talk 327 10-23-2012 08:59 PM
Political Joke Thread Parallax General Talk 42 04-20-2012 06:42 AM



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:22 PM. | See also: NikonForums.com, CanonForums.com part of our network of photo forums!
  • Red (Default)
  • Green
  • Gray
  • Dark
  • Dark Yellow
  • Dark Blue
  • Old Red
  • Old Green
  • Old Gray
  • Dial-Up Style
Hello! It's great to see you back on the forum! Have you considered joining the community?
register
Creating a FREE ACCOUNT takes under a minute, removes ads, and lets you post! [Dismiss]
Top