[mkgd1]

Translation:

Perpetual motion & infinite energy ?

1. Cats always fall on their feet
2. The buttered slice always falls on the butter side
3. Attach buttered slice to the back of a cat
4. The cat pivots continually never touching the ground
5. Attach cat-buttered slice to a generator
6. Perpetual motion ⇒ infinite energy

If I'd scrolled down to the translation, I would have saved 5 minutes recalling my schoolboy French from 1959.

[Parallax]

cat "water", normally labelled as Lager....

Ahhhh, yes. We have that here. Here it's known as Coors. (or Budweiser)

[WPRESTO]

Translation:

Perpetual motion & infinite energy ?

1. Cats always fall on their feet
2. The buttered slice always falls on the butter side
3. Attach buttered slice to the back of a cat
4. The cat pivots continually never touching the ground
5. Attach cat-buttered slice to a generator
6. Perpetual motion ⇒ infinite energy

Now that proves you should never trust intelligent well-educated people, you shouldn't listen to scientists. If they had never discovered entropy, we'd all have perpetual motion machines. As to the so-called Law of Gravity, let's be rebels!

[Tako Kichi]

Reminds me of the book by Simon Bond, 101 Uses For A Dead Cat.

I have that book......and it's sequel, '101 Uses For A Dead Human' where the cats get revenge!

[35mmfilmfan]

As to the so-called Law of Gravity, let's be rebels!

One thing I have discovered - as you get older, gravity gets stronger.

[Parallax]

One thing I have discovered - as you get older, gravity gets stronger.

According to the Charge Nurse I used to work for there is a little known law of physics that states "Old people are like electricity. They both go to ground at every opportunity".

[MarkJerling]

One thing I have discovered - as you get older, gravity gets stronger.

As I frequently seem to discover.

[35mmfilmfan]

But it's not only me - inanimate objects do it too ! I put something down on a surface I can clearly see from the corner of my eye, only to find that gravity has played tricks with me yet again. I have one of those long-handled 'grabbers' to pick up small items from the floor, so that I don't join them - but what the funicular railway do I do when I drop that ?

Answers on a high-value bank note, or blank cheque, please.

[Parallax]

but what the funicular railway do I do when I drop that ?

Keep spares.
That's the way I handle soap problems. I keep three or four bars in the soap dish in the shower. Later in the morning, after I've limbered up a bit, I pick them up off of the shower floor and put them back in the dish.

[WPRESTO]

One thing I have discovered - as you get older, gravity gets stronger.

I've noticed that phenomenon, especially when I've been foolish enough to get down on a knee to take a low-perspective photograph as I used to do routinely twenty years ago (or was it forty?). Another thing, time is running faster now that I have less available. Just like money, the less there is in my account the quicker it disappears. But time is different from money. There are ways to save money and even accumulate more, but time, you are allotted just so much, and you cannot save it, you cannot recall any that you spend, and you cannot increase your supply. The government ought to do something, considering the amount of my diminishing supply of money they take.

[35mmfilmfan]

Going back to the earlier mentions of Graffiti, another of my faves is :

Stand up straight - get the Law of Gravity repealed.

[StiffLegged]

Yiddish joke from many years ago:-

In the village, life continued in its ordered way as it had for many years until one morning the schlemiel dropped his breakfast slice of bread and it landed lard side up. He stared at this in wonder for some time: he had never before seen the bread fall other than lard side down. Finally, an idea dawned in his mind and he went to the elders with a question. Excitedly, he told them what had happened before asking the all-important question: was he still a schlemiel? The elders looked at each other: this was indeed a weighty matter. They would have to think about it very carefully. The schlemiel was told to get on with his work and they would give their decision in due course.

The elders spent the rest of that day debating, and half the next morning, before giving their judgement. The bread had indeed landed lard side up, but he was still a schlemiel, because being a schlemiel he had of course spread the lard on the wrong side

[Liney]

Best way to get rid of someone sitting too close to you in public - when they sit down wait a second then just look straight ahead and ask in a low voice "did you bring the money...."

[timb64]

Best way to get rid of someone sitting too close to you in public - when they sit down wait a second then just look straight ahead and ask in a low voice "did you bring the money...."

These days all you need to do is cough!

[WPRESTO]

Best way to get rid of someone sitting too close to you in public - when they sit down wait a second then just look straight ahead and ask in a low voice "did you bring the money...."

Mumble as if talking to yourself, but just loud enough to be heard: "Man those baked beans and hotdogs are stirring my bowels."