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The Joke Thread


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12-23-2020, 11:36 PM - 1 Like   #3556
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I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.

It’s impossible to put down.
12-24-2020, 12:25 AM - 6 Likes   #3557
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12-24-2020, 12:18 PM - 3 Likes   #3558
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Tired of elf on a shelf...
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12-24-2020, 02:26 PM - 8 Likes   #3559
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Damn, I am way behind on my reading for this thread ... holidays should allow for a bit of catching up ... here, a FB steal. Happy Holidays to all!

Translation: "Attention! Risk of kidnapping by extra-terrestrials"




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12-24-2020, 02:29 PM - 1 Like   #3560
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Jean, you must be 1000's of posts behind on the thread too.
12-24-2020, 03:06 PM - 7 Likes   #3561
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I got home and there was a terrible smell in the house.

I said to my wife: “What’s that smell?”

She said: “I’ve just made the chicken soup.”

I said: “Thank goodness for that. I thought it was for us.”
12-25-2020, 01:10 AM - 3 Likes   #3562
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I have this incredible ability to predict what’s inside a wrapped present.

It’s a gift!
12-25-2020, 04:00 AM - 7 Likes   #3563
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A guy runs into an old west saloon and ducks behind the bar. Bartender says “Get out, you aren’t allowed back there!” Guy says “I have to hide, I just chased the Sheriffs chicken down the street! My mom told me I’d go to jail if I ever ran a fowl of the law!”

I’m here all week...
12-25-2020, 06:27 AM   #3564
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QuoteOriginally posted by steamloco76 Quote
A guy runs into an old west saloon and ducks behind the bar. Bartender says “Get out, you aren’t allowed back there!” Guy says “I have to hide, I just chased the Sheriffs chicken down the street! My mom told me I’d go to jail if I ever ran a fowl of the law!”

I’m here all week...
12-25-2020, 10:50 AM - 6 Likes   #3565
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From the "Complots Faciles" page of my FB feed ... "Complot faciles" = easy conspiracies

Translation = "Rare photo of the car that drives behind you at night"
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12-25-2020, 10:55 AM - 6 Likes   #3566
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A bit for Trek fans ...
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12-25-2020, 01:38 PM - 2 Likes   #3567
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A couple more “Not elf on the shelf” memes created by my warped mind...
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12-25-2020, 07:01 PM   #3568
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QuoteOriginally posted by steamloco76 Quote
A couple more “Not elf on the shelf” memes created by my warped mind...
Damn, that second photo brought back memories of my 1970's & '80's television-watching habits...
12-25-2020, 09:55 PM - 8 Likes   #3569
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The first time I got a universal remote control I thought to myself, “This changes everything”.
12-26-2020, 12:28 PM - 6 Likes   #3570
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I've got conned on Ebay!
I ordered a ring and a necklace for my wife, but they sent me a new camera!
Be careful, lest the same thing happens to you...
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