The Joke Thread

que es tu · 03-21-2021, 06:55 AM - **11 Likes**

Once there was a great king of a big Pacific island who lived in a grass hut. He had an elaborate throne decorated with shells, coral, pearls, and gold and jewels given by visiting dignitaries. He was very proud of his throne, but grew afraid that someone would steal it because it was so valuable. He decided to stow his priceless throne in the attic of his grass hut and use an ordinary chair instead. One day a big storm blew in while he held court sitting in his chair directly beneath his throne in the attic. The wind blew and caused the grass hut to collapse and the throne crushed the poor king to death.

The moral of the story?? People who live in grass houses shouldn’t stow thrones!!!

gifthorse · 03-21-2021, 04:01 PM - **3 Likes**

Originally posted by SpecialK

The camel experiment did not work out.

Seriously, camels don't like rocky ground. Hi Jolly's grave is the most popular tourist attraction in Quartzsite. Runners up may include rwo retired F4 fighter jets parked on a street corner in a "Freedom Garden", and a normally-unremarkable ironwood tree over 1,000 years old, named The Great Tree...

I'd like to see Hi Jolly's grave someday. An excellent book on Lt. Beale and Major Wayne and the U.S. Camel Corps I'd highly recommend is The Last Camel Charge by Forrest Bryant Johnson. Camels are/were superior to horses in every way. The only thing the camels failed to do was eat the hay they carried for food. It turns out that the camels much preferred eating the desert brush and scrub so the animals didn't even need to carry fodder. Two things actually doomed the Camel Corps. 1. the U.S. Civil War disrupted the experiment and 2. the same thing that doomed the Pony Express. The Transcontinental Railroad.

**WPRESTO** · 03-21-2021, 06:57 PM - **1 Like**

Maybe this will resonate and maybe not.

A musician found a big marble columns all covered with moss that made lovely sounds when the wind blew, but only after several prolonged heavy rains. He recorded the noise, added some vocals and released it as the "Pillar, Tall and Hairy Soak Longs" album

lesmore49 · 03-21-2021, 09:09 PM - **2 Likes**

Originally posted by gifthorse

I'd like to see Hi Jolly's grave someday. An excellent book on Lt. Beale and Major Wayne and the U.S. Camel Corps I'd highly recommend is The Last Camel Charge by Forrest Bryant Johnson. Camels are/were superior to horses in every way. The only thing the camels failed to do was eat the hay they carried for food. It turns out that the camels much preferred eating the desert brush and scrub so the animals didn't even need to carry fodder. Two things actually doomed the Camel Corps. 1. the U.S. Civil War disrupted the experiment and 2. the same thing that doomed the Pony Express. The Transcontinental Railroad.

I understand a third thing also contributed to the demise of the camel experiment. The mule lobby in Washington, D.C. , which lobbied the feds to end the experiment . As it was cutting into their business.

**WPRESTO** · 03-22-2021, 06:52 AM - **1 Like**

The musician mentioned in my post above also discovered that certain thorn bushes when wet with dew also produced sounds pleasing to the ear. He recorded and amplified it, added lyrics and released a second album "Songs around the Damp Briar."

Martin Stu · 03-22-2021, 08:50 AM - **1 Like**

- do you play the piano?
- Yes.
- And the guitar?
- Yes, I play.
- What about the drum?
- Yes, and on the drum.
- And the harp?
-Not. I don't play the harp: the cards fall between the strings...

Kunzite · 03-24-2021, 08:24 AM - **3 Likes**

An old lady in a fish store:
- this fish, is it fresh?
- isn't it obvious? It's still alive!
- but, I'm alive as well...

**StiffLegged** · 03-25-2021, 01:05 PM - **6 Likes**

Why do astronauts on the ISS only use MacBooks?

They're not allowed to open Windows in outer space.

MarkJerling · 03-25-2021, 01:14 PM - **19 Likes**

Yesterday my wife thought she saw a cockroach in the kitchen. She sprayed everything, unpacked and repacked the cupboards and pantry, wiped everything, vacuumed, disinfected and cleaned thoroughly.
Today I’m putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

Jean Poitiers · 03-26-2021, 03:11 AM - **7 Likes**

Trek humor ...

35mmfilmfan · 03-26-2021, 07:47 AM - **3 Likes**

Food Songs :

Donut forsake me, oh my darling

I'll Beetroot to you, yes I will

Kebab bab bab, Barbara Ann

There's a plaice for us

Ham roll over Beethoven

Pheasant Valley Sunday

**cartesio** · 03-27-2021, 05:38 PM - **5 Likes**

The inventor of the umbrella was originally going to call it brella... but he hesitated.

**RobA_Oz** · 03-27-2021, 07:13 PM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by cartesio

The inventor of the umbrella was originally going to call it brella... but he hesitated.

At least he didn’t err.

35mmfilmfan · 03-28-2021, 02:11 AM - **1 Like**

One caught fire, and turned into Burnt Umber Ella.

He was really browned off.

bxf · 03-28-2021, 10:51 AM - **13 Likes**

It's been a bit of a strange day! First, I find a hat full of money. Then, I am chased by an angry guy with a guitar...

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03-21-2021, 06:55 AM - 11 Likes	#3811
que es tu Pentaxian Join Date: Feb 2020 Location: Smoky Mountains, NC Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,602	Once there was a great king of a big Pacific island who lived in a grass hut. He had an elaborate throne decorated with shells, coral, pearls, and gold and jewels given by visiting dignitaries. He was very proud of his throne, but grew afraid that someone would steal it because it was so valuable. He decided to stow his priceless throne in the attic of his grass hut and use an ordinary chair instead. One day a big storm blew in while he held court sitting in his chair directly beneath his throne in the attic. The wind blew and caused the grass hut to collapse and the throne crushed the poor king to death. The moral of the story?? People who live in grass houses shouldn’t stow thrones!!!

03-21-2021, 04:01 PM - 3 Likes	#3812
gifthorse Pentaxian Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Nevada Photos: Gallery Posts: 2,945	Originally posted by SpecialK The camel experiment did not work out. Seriously, camels don't like rocky ground. Hi Jolly's grave is the most popular tourist attraction in Quartzsite. Runners up may include rwo retired F4 fighter jets parked on a street corner in a "Freedom Garden", and a normally-unremarkable ironwood tree over 1,000 years old, named The Great Tree... I'd like to see Hi Jolly's grave someday. An excellent book on Lt. Beale and Major Wayne and the U.S. Camel Corps I'd highly recommend is The Last Camel Charge by Forrest Bryant Johnson. Camels are/were superior to horses in every way. The only thing the camels failed to do was eat the hay they carried for food. It turns out that the camels much preferred eating the desert brush and scrub so the animals didn't even need to carry fodder. Two things actually doomed the Camel Corps. 1. the U.S. Civil War disrupted the experiment and 2. the same thing that doomed the Pony Express. The Transcontinental Railroad.

03-21-2021, 06:57 PM - 1 Like	#3813
WPRESTO Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: Massachusetts Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 59,104	Maybe this will resonate and maybe not. A musician found a big marble columns all covered with moss that made lovely sounds when the wind blew, but only after several prolonged heavy rains. He recorded the noise, added some vocals and released it as the "Pillar, Tall and Hairy Soak Longs" album

03-21-2021, 09:09 PM - 2 Likes	#3814
lesmore49 Pentaxian Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Western Canada Posts: 12,337	Originally posted by gifthorse I'd like to see Hi Jolly's grave someday. An excellent book on Lt. Beale and Major Wayne and the U.S. Camel Corps I'd highly recommend is The Last Camel Charge by Forrest Bryant Johnson. Camels are/were superior to horses in every way. The only thing the camels failed to do was eat the hay they carried for food. It turns out that the camels much preferred eating the desert brush and scrub so the animals didn't even need to carry fodder. Two things actually doomed the Camel Corps. 1. the U.S. Civil War disrupted the experiment and 2. the same thing that doomed the Pony Express. The Transcontinental Railroad. I understand a third thing also contributed to the demise of the camel experiment. The mule lobby in Washington, D.C. , which lobbied the feds to end the experiment . As it was cutting into their business.

03-22-2021, 06:52 AM - 1 Like	#3815
WPRESTO Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: Massachusetts Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 59,104	The musician mentioned in my post above also discovered that certain thorn bushes when wet with dew also produced sounds pleasing to the ear. He recorded and amplified it, added lyrics and released a second album "Songs around the Damp Briar."

03-22-2021, 08:50 AM - 1 Like	#3816
Martin Stu Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2019 Posts: 1,115	- do you play the piano? - Yes. - And the guitar? - Yes, I play. - What about the drum? - Yes, and on the drum. - And the harp? -Not. I don't play the harp: the cards fall between the strings...

03-24-2021, 08:24 AM - 3 Likes	#3817
Kunzite Pentaxian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Romania Posts: 15,132	An old lady in a fish store: - this fish, is it fresh? - isn't it obvious? It's still alive! - but, I'm alive as well...

03-25-2021, 01:05 PM - 6 Likes	#3818
StiffLegged Site Supporter Join Date: Jan 2018 Photos: Gallery Posts: 4,615	Why do astronauts on the ISS only use MacBooks? They're not allowed to open Windows in outer space.

03-25-2021, 01:14 PM - 19 Likes	#3819
MarkJerling Moderator Site Supporter Join Date: May 2012 Location: Wairarapa, New Zealand Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 20,404	Yesterday my wife thought she saw a cockroach in the kitchen. She sprayed everything, unpacked and repacked the cupboards and pantry, wiped everything, vacuumed, disinfected and cleaned thoroughly. Today I’m putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

03-26-2021, 07:47 AM - 3 Likes	#3821
35mmfilmfan Pentaxian Join Date: Oct 2016 Location: Norfolk, UK Posts: 4,323	Food Songs : Donut forsake me, oh my darling I'll Beetroot to you, yes I will Kebab bab bab, Barbara Ann There's a plaice for us Ham roll over Beethoven Pheasant Valley Sunday

03-27-2021, 05:38 PM - 5 Likes	#3822
cartesio Site Supporter Join Date: Jun 2016 Photos: Gallery Posts: 899	The inventor of the umbrella was originally going to call it brella... but he hesitated.

03-27-2021, 07:13 PM - 1 Like	#3823
RobA_Oz Site Supporter Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Tasmania, Australia Photos: Gallery Posts: 8,196	Originally posted by cartesio The inventor of the umbrella was originally going to call it brella... but he hesitated. At least he didn’t err.

03-28-2021, 02:11 AM - 1 Like	#3824
35mmfilmfan Pentaxian Join Date: Oct 2016 Location: Norfolk, UK Posts: 4,323	One caught fire, and turned into Burnt Umber Ella. He was really browned off.

03-28-2021, 10:51 AM - 13 Likes	#3825
bxf Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Lisbon area Posts: 1,660	It's been a bit of a strange day! First, I find a hat full of money. Then, I am chased by an angry guy with a guitar...

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