The Joke Thread

Tako Kichi · 01-18-2022, 06:33 AM - **5 Likes**

Originally posted by bertwert

I'm not sure if us pipe band folk even consider them as people...

Oh you just 'Peed Off' my wife with that comment!

She was a snare/tenor drummer in a pipe band in her teens and her next oldest sister was a cat strangler ... err ... piper!

normhead · 01-18-2022, 06:39 AM - **3 Likes**

Originally posted by Tako Kichi

Oh you just 'Peed Off' my wife with that comment!

She was a snare/tenor drummer in a pipe band in her teens and her next oldest sister was a cat strangler ... err ... piper!

And my sister was a Scottish dancer.... I guess it's only the sisters that have culture... well excluding Bert of course.

Tako Kichi · 01-18-2022, 06:44 AM - **3 Likes**

Originally posted by normhead

And my sister was a Scottish dancer.... I guess it's only the sisters that have culture... well excluding Bert of course.

Perhaps that's why he wears a skirt!

Parallax · 01-18-2022, 06:53 AM - **5 Likes**

Originally posted by RobA_Oz

Hmm. What happens if you play it backwards?

I don't know what happens with Inna Gadda Da Vida, but if you play a country/western song backwards you get your truck back, you get your wife back, you get your dog back, you get your house back, you get your job back.

**cartesio** · 01-18-2022, 07:42 AM - **1 Like**

Do you get your quarter back? Asking for a friend, you know.

**Photos-by-Chas** · 01-18-2022, 11:19 AM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by slartibartfast01

OK but it is still more than eight minutes, too long for any solo. For me drum solos serve the same purpose as Keith Richards solo songs in a Stones concert, a perfect time for a toilet break

Are you saying drummers have large bladders with great muscle control?

Racer X 69 · 01-18-2022, 11:28 AM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by Photos-by-Chas

Are you saying drummers have large bladders with great muscle control?

If they can’t go more than eight minutes between pee breaks they probably have a prostate problem.

**Photos-by-Chas** · 01-18-2022, 12:38 PM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by Racer X 69

If they can’t go more than eight minutes between pee breaks they probably have a prostate problem.

If they do have prostate problems, it probably takes them eight minutes to pee.

Parallax · 01-18-2022, 04:53 PM - **9 Likes**

You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving.

(Unless you plan on doing it a second time.)

35mmfilmfan · 01-19-2022, 09:30 AM - **5 Likes**

Originally posted by Parallax

You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving.

(Unless you plan on doing it a second time.)

Isn't that called 'Jumping to a conclusion' ?

Martin Stu · 01-19-2022, 09:51 AM - **3 Likes**

after you

Parallax · 01-20-2022, 07:16 AM - **10 Likes**

What do you call a snake that is 3.14 feet long?

A πthon

35mmfilmfan · 01-20-2022, 08:06 AM - **4 Likes**

The Lost Parrot -

Where's Polygon ?

Up a Geometry

Unregistered User 8 · 01-21-2022, 05:02 AM - **3 Likes**

Ol' Doc Johnson finally retired, having looked after us in the town for just over 56 years.

As a replacement, he got a young modern doctor who uses naturopathy, aroma-therapy and homeopathy, along with traditional medicine.

Not sure the townsfolk will warm to his unorthodox ways anytime soon.

He got off to a very bad start when he had the siren removed from the town ambulance, and had it replaced with wind-chimes.

Martin Stu · 01-21-2022, 10:53 AM - **1 Like**

scuffle

01-18-2022, 04:53 PM - 9 Likes	#4674
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. (Unless you plan on doing it a second time.) Last edited by Parallax; 01-18-2022 at 05:05 PM.

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01-18-2022, 06:33 AM - 5 Likes	#4666
Tako Kichi Veteran Member Join Date: May 2013 Location: SW Ontario, Canada (ex-pat Brit) Posts: 1,296	Originally posted by bertwert I'm not sure if us pipe band folk even consider them as people... Oh you just 'Peed Off' my wife with that comment! She was a snare/tenor drummer in a pipe band in her teens and her next oldest sister was a cat strangler ... err ... piper!

01-18-2022, 06:39 AM - 3 Likes	#4667
normhead Pentaxian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Near Algonquin Park Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 40,451	Originally posted by Tako Kichi Oh you just 'Peed Off' my wife with that comment! She was a snare/tenor drummer in a pipe band in her teens and her next oldest sister was a cat strangler ... err ... piper! And my sister was a Scottish dancer.... I guess it's only the sisters that have culture... well excluding Bert of course.

01-18-2022, 06:44 AM - 3 Likes	#4668
Tako Kichi Veteran Member Join Date: May 2013 Location: SW Ontario, Canada (ex-pat Brit) Posts: 1,296	Originally posted by normhead And my sister was a Scottish dancer.... I guess it's only the sisters that have culture... well excluding Bert of course. Perhaps that's why he wears a skirt!

01-18-2022, 06:53 AM - 5 Likes	#4669
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	Originally posted by RobA_Oz Hmm. What happens if you play it backwards? I don't know what happens with Inna Gadda Da Vida, but if you play a country/western song backwards you get your truck back, you get your wife back, you get your dog back, you get your house back, you get your job back.

01-18-2022, 07:42 AM - 1 Like	#4670
cartesio Site Supporter Join Date: Jun 2016 Photos: Gallery Posts: 900	Do you get your quarter back? Asking for a friend, you know.

01-18-2022, 11:19 AM - 1 Like	#4671
Photos-by-Chas Site Supporter Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: Northwest Pennsylvania, USA Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,318	Originally posted by slartibartfast01 OK but it is still more than eight minutes, too long for any solo. For me drum solos serve the same purpose as Keith Richards solo songs in a Stones concert, a perfect time for a toilet break Are you saying drummers have large bladders with great muscle control?

01-18-2022, 11:28 AM - 1 Like	#4672
Racer X 69 Moderator Man With A Camera Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: The Great Pacific Northwet, in the Land Between Canada and Mexico Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 28,073	Originally posted by Photos-by-Chas Are you saying drummers have large bladders with great muscle control? If they can’t go more than eight minutes between pee breaks they probably have a prostate problem.

01-18-2022, 12:38 PM - 1 Like	#4673
Photos-by-Chas Site Supporter Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: Northwest Pennsylvania, USA Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,318	Originally posted by Racer X 69 If they can’t go more than eight minutes between pee breaks they probably have a prostate problem. If they do have prostate problems, it probably takes them eight minutes to pee.

01-19-2022, 09:30 AM - 5 Likes	#4675
35mmfilmfan Pentaxian Join Date: Oct 2016 Location: Norfolk, UK Posts: 4,338	Originally posted by Parallax You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. (Unless you plan on doing it a second time.) Isn't that called 'Jumping to a conclusion' ?

01-19-2022, 09:51 AM - 3 Likes	#4676
Martin Stu Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2019 Posts: 1,115	after you

01-20-2022, 07:16 AM - 10 Likes	#4677
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	What do you call a snake that is 3.14 feet long? A πthon

01-20-2022, 08:06 AM - 4 Likes	#4678
35mmfilmfan Pentaxian Join Date: Oct 2016 Location: Norfolk, UK Posts: 4,338	The Lost Parrot - Where's Polygon ? Up a Geometry

01-21-2022, 05:02 AM - 3 Likes	#4679
Unregistered User 8 Closed Account Join Date: Mar 2015 Photos: Gallery Posts: 8,694	Ol' Doc Johnson finally retired, having looked after us in the town for just over 56 years. As a replacement, he got a young modern doctor who uses naturopathy, aroma-therapy and homeopathy, along with traditional medicine. Not sure the townsfolk will warm to his unorthodox ways anytime soon. He got off to a very bad start when he had the siren removed from the town ambulance, and had it replaced with wind-chimes.

01-21-2022, 10:53 AM - 1 Like	#4680
Martin Stu Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2019 Posts: 1,115	scuffle