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Transit · 02-01-2016, 01:20 AM

Originally posted by p38arover

....

I love jokes about us Aussies.

the cricket

p38arover · 02-01-2016, 05:55 AM

Originally posted by Transit

the cricket

Sporting jokes don't work with me. I don't follow sport in any way, shape, or form.

I remember a bloke from Telecom NZ calling me up one day (I worked in international telecoms) to boast about something like Bledisloe Cup and I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

Rupert · 02-01-2016, 06:36 AM

There are those with a sense of humor and those without. I have noted over the years that a large % of photographers I see on various Forums are deadly serious with almost zero tolerance for humor of any kind. It is all a life and death serious world they live in....

I'd hate to live in that state of mind.....there are just so many things in this world that are damn funny, and a good laugh can make my day even when I am in a down mood. It's like a shot of adrenaline for the spirit.

Jokes are not going away....and I'm glad they aren't

Regards!

Parallax · 02-02-2016, 02:35 PM

Originally posted by Dewman

I'm Native American and you have my permission to make all the jokes you want about my culture and heritage. Custer had it comin'!

A thought came to mind that had not occurred to me before.
I've lived here in South Dakota for nearly 40 years. We have a very large Native American population yet I don't think I know a single Native American joke.
Norwegian jokes, well, that's another story. As Jimmy Durante said: "I got a million of em!"

sherrvonne · 02-02-2016, 03:01 PM

Originally posted by Dewman

I'm Native American and you have my permission to make all the jokes you want about my culture and heritage. Custer had it comin'!

I am totally mixed, you could get me with any joke, blond, female, white, black, Cherokee, Irish, Prussian ( that one would be difficult, lol), French, everything but Pirate jokes

**csa** · 02-02-2016, 03:13 PM

Originally posted by sherrvonne

everything but Pirate jokes

What? you're not a Pirate?

Dewman · 02-02-2016, 03:34 PM

A Native American Joke:

I'm Native American (Comanche) so when a Native American sex shop opened up nearby, I had to go in and buy a wet-dreamcatcher.

sherrvonne · 02-02-2016, 03:51 PM

Originally posted by csa

What? you're not a Pirate?

Well, I here tell, some of my relatives were into distilling alcohol.

**csa** · 02-02-2016, 04:29 PM

Arrrrrgh! That should qualify you!

sherrvonne · 02-02-2016, 04:35 PM - **2 Likes**

Originally posted by csa

Arrrrrgh! That should qualify you!

I won't arrrrghue with that.

timb64 · 02-02-2016, 05:46 PM

At the risk of being hoist by my own petard and accused of making fun of amputees,here's my favourite Pirate joke

A pirate walks into bar and sits down. The bartender notices that he has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and a patch over one eye. The pirate orders a beer, and while he’s pouring it the bartender asks “So what’s the story with the leg?”

“Well it were many a year ago,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard, and a shark swum up and bit me leg clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a peg leg that very night.”

“That’s terrible,” says the bartender. “What about the hand?”

“Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard again, and a whale came up and bit me hand clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a hook that very night.”

“Wow,” says the bartender. “So what about the eye?”

“Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship, and I were lookin out fer rogue waves, and a seagull flew over and pooped right in me eye!”

“Oh man,” says the bartender. “And that blinded you?”

“Well no,” says the pirate. “But it were me first day with the hook.”

sherrvonne · 02-02-2016, 10:37 PM

Originally posted by timb64

At the risk of being hoist by my own petard and accused of making fun of amputees,here's my favourite Pirate joke

A pirate walks into bar and sits down. The bartender notices that he has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and a patch over one eye. The pirate orders a beer, and while he’s pouring it the bartender asks “So what’s the story with the leg?”

“Well it were many a year ago,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard, and a shark swum up and bit me leg clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a peg leg that very night.”

“That’s terrible,” says the bartender. “What about the hand?”

“Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard again, and a whale came up and bit me hand clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a hook that very night.”

“Wow,” says the bartender. “So what about the eye?”

“Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship, and I were lookin out fer rogue waves, and a seagull flew over and pooped right in me eye!”

“Oh man,” says the bartender. “And that blinded you?”

“Well no,” says the pirate. “But it were me first day with the hook.”

That's the joke.... It's hilarious.

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02-01-2016, 01:20 AM	#16
Transit Pentaxian Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Whanganui NZ Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 4,624	Originally posted by p38arover .... I love jokes about us Aussies. the cricket

02-01-2016, 05:55 AM	#17
p38arover Veteran Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Western Sydney, Australia Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 3,084	Originally posted by Transit the cricket Sporting jokes don't work with me. I don't follow sport in any way, shape, or form. I remember a bloke from Telecom NZ calling me up one day (I worked in international telecoms) to boast about something like Bledisloe Cup and I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

02-01-2016, 06:36 AM	#18
Rupert Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 25,123	There are those with a sense of humor and those without. I have noted over the years that a large % of photographers I see on various Forums are deadly serious with almost zero tolerance for humor of any kind. It is all a life and death serious world they live in.... I'd hate to live in that state of mind.....there are just so many things in this world that are damn funny, and a good laugh can make my day even when I am in a down mood. It's like a shot of adrenaline for the spirit. Jokes are not going away....and I'm glad they aren't Regards!

02-02-2016, 02:35 PM	#19
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,333	Originally posted by Dewman I'm Native American and you have my permission to make all the jokes you want about my culture and heritage. Custer had it comin'! A thought came to mind that had not occurred to me before. I've lived here in South Dakota for nearly 40 years. We have a very large Native American population yet I don't think I know a single Native American joke. Norwegian jokes, well, that's another story. As Jimmy Durante said: "I got a million of em!"

02-02-2016, 03:01 PM	#20
sherrvonne Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,975	Originally posted by Dewman I'm Native American and you have my permission to make all the jokes you want about my culture and heritage. Custer had it comin'! I am totally mixed, you could get me with any joke, blond, female, white, black, Cherokee, Irish, Prussian ( that one would be difficult, lol), French, everything but Pirate jokes

02-02-2016, 03:13 PM	#21
csa Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: Montana mountains Posts: 10,133	Originally posted by sherrvonne everything but Pirate jokes What? you're not a Pirate?

02-02-2016, 03:34 PM	#22
Dewman Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Location: Idaho Posts: 5,492 Original Poster	A Native American Joke: I'm Native American (Comanche) so when a Native American sex shop opened up nearby, I had to go in and buy a wet-dreamcatcher.

02-02-2016, 03:51 PM	#23
sherrvonne Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,975	Originally posted by csa What? you're not a Pirate? Well, I here tell, some of my relatives were into distilling alcohol.

02-02-2016, 04:29 PM	#24
csa Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: Montana mountains Posts: 10,133	Arrrrrgh! That should qualify you!

02-02-2016, 04:35 PM - 2 Likes	#25
sherrvonne Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,975	Originally posted by csa Arrrrrgh! That should qualify you! I won't arrrrghue with that.

02-02-2016, 05:46 PM	#26
timb64 Pentaxian Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: /Situation : Doing my best to avoid idiots! Photos: Gallery Posts: 9,514	At the risk of being hoist by my own petard and accused of making fun of amputees,here's my favourite Pirate joke A pirate walks into bar and sits down. The bartender notices that he has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and a patch over one eye. The pirate orders a beer, and while he’s pouring it the bartender asks “So what’s the story with the leg?” “Well it were many a year ago,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard, and a shark swum up and bit me leg clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a peg leg that very night.” “That’s terrible,” says the bartender. “What about the hand?” “Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard again, and a whale came up and bit me hand clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a hook that very night.” “Wow,” says the bartender. “So what about the eye?” “Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship, and I were lookin out fer rogue waves, and a seagull flew over and pooped right in me eye!” “Oh man,” says the bartender. “And that blinded you?” “Well no,” says the pirate. “But it were me first day with the hook.”

02-02-2016, 10:37 PM	#27
sherrvonne Pentaxian Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,975	Originally posted by timb64 At the risk of being hoist by my own petard and accused of making fun of amputees,here's my favourite Pirate joke A pirate walks into bar and sits down. The bartender notices that he has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and a patch over one eye. The pirate orders a beer, and while he’s pouring it the bartender asks “So what’s the story with the leg?” “Well it were many a year ago,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard, and a shark swum up and bit me leg clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a peg leg that very night.” “That’s terrible,” says the bartender. “What about the hand?” “Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship and a rogue wave swept me overboard again, and a whale came up and bit me hand clean off! I swum ashore and were fitted fer a hook that very night.” “Wow,” says the bartender. “So what about the eye?” “Well it were the very next day,” says the pirate. “I were walkin on the deck a me ship, and I were lookin out fer rogue waves, and a seagull flew over and pooped right in me eye!” “Oh man,” says the bartender. “And that blinded you?” “Well no,” says the pirate. “But it were me first day with the hook.” That's the joke.... It's hilarious.

Baptising an Irishman

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