[LeDave]

I work at a hotel here near the Mall of America and there's this one girl that works with me sometimes, she's suppose to be the supervisor. She takes advantage of the fact that I'm really nice and sometimes she will do sick twisted and manipulative games on me. I don't know whether she's doing it because she just naturally feels like she needs a boost in self-esteem or because I'm doing a really good job and she feels like I'm a threat to her.

There has already been a person that just recently quit because of her, and there's another girl that's quitting and she warned another new girl about the supervisor saying she's a sticker.

I'm recently new here too and I've only been working for 3 weeks now and about 10 days total. Today will be my 11th day and everyday I'm scared to go to work and I don't want to go to work because I'll see her. She black mails me to our AGM and she shows signs of anger at me when I tell her I don't feel comfortable doing something such as not driving the shuttle last Monday because it was raining hard and it was dark at night, I've never driven the shuttle or anything in that size before and I didn't feel comfortable driving it at that time.

She makes it obvious in a way that she's angry with me without other co-workers knowing. Such as being really quiet and keeping a really straight face after I tell her I can't do something. She also over exaggerates my minor screw-ups to our AGM because I'm new. She's extremely manipulative and really twisted and she does things in a way that goes to her favor and makes others look really bad.

The new girl that works there is my friend and I know her in real life, she's really really nice to her and tells her she's cute and stuff, but when it comes to me she's secretly mean without other co-workers knowing and I think she's being nice to my friend in purpose to have some sort of back-up going on in her mind. I don't know what to do or say, I think I really should just quit but I really need this job and money, I haven't had a new job in the longest while and it took me literally FOREVER to find this job. I'm afraid that if I try to tell my GM or AGM about her or tell anybody anything about her, it will back-wash back at me because she's really smart and twisted and knows how to manipulate things in her favor.

Have you guys ever had a person you work with that is like this? Even worse, the AGM or GM made her the supervisor? How do you deal with such a thing especially when you know you can't quit or find a new job, and you certainly can't tell her to the AGM or GM because they probably think she's a little hard working angel.

[flippedgazelle]

I work at a hotel here near the Mall of America and there's this one girl that works with me sometimes, she's suppose to be the supervisor. She takes advantage of the fact that I'm really nice and sometimes she will do sick twisted and manipulative games on me. I don't know whether she's doing it because she just naturally feels like she needs a boost in self-esteem or because I'm doing a really good job and she feels like I'm a threat to her.

There has already been a person that just recently quit because of her, and there's another girl that's quitting and she warned another new girl about the supervisor saying she's a sticker.

I'm recently new here too and I've only been working for 3 weeks now and about 10 days total. Today will be my 11th day and everyday I'm scared to go to work and I don't want to go to work because I'll see her. She black mails me to our AGM and she shows signs of anger at me when I tell her I don't feel comfortable doing something such as not driving the shuttle last Monday because it was raining hard and it was dark at night, I've never driven the shuttle or anything in that size before and I didn't feel comfortable driving it at that time.

She makes it obvious in a way that she's angry with me without other co-workers knowing. Such as being really quiet and keeping a really straight face after I tell her I can't do something. She also over exaggerates my minor screw-ups to our AGM because I'm new. She's extremely manipulative and really twisted and she does things in a way that goes to her favor and makes others look really bad.

The new girl that works there is my friend and I know her in real life, she's really really nice to her and tells her she's cute and stuff, but when it comes to me she's secretly mean without other co-workers knowing and I think she's being nice to my friend in purpose to have some sort of back-up going on in her mind. I don't know what to do or say, I think I really should just quit but I really need this job and money, I haven't had a new job in the longest while and it took me literally FOREVER to find this job. I'm afraid that if I try to tell my GM or AGM about her or tell anybody anything about her, it will back-wash back at me because she's really smart and twisted and knows how to manipulate things in her favor.

Have you guys ever had a person you work with that is like this? Even worse, the AGM or GM made her the supervisor? How do you deal with such a thing especially when you know you can't quit or find a new job, and you certainly can't tell her to the AGM or GM because they probably think she's a little hard working angel.

Well, you could always ask your supe if there if she has some particular issue with you. But perhaps that may be intimidating.

First thing is, document any unpleasantness. Date, time, description. Be precise. You should have a printed copy of your job description, and make note if she has you doing things that fall outside your job description.

Second, is there a Human Resources Dept. you can go to?

Third, actively pursue another job. Unfortunately, whackjob co-workers and bosses are a common animal in the job jungle.

[heliphoto]

Keep in mind as you read this, that I have no real experience working within a company structure like you probably have. I kinda do right now, but I've never even met the HR person, and I go to the office about three times a year... So I really don't know what I'm talking about (except the first paragraph below).

First of all - when confronted with a safety issue, like driving a vehicle you're unfamiliar with in adverse conditions, you made the absolute right call! I have to do this all the time - turn down flights in a helicopter, that another pilot would make (and I accept flights that another pilot would turn down, it's all comfort zone with specific conditions and missions). I would imagine your hotel might have a training program you're supposed to go through before you operate company equipment in an official capacity, and if they don't, they should. If driving that thing is going to be part of your duties, get out in some good weather and drive that thing around (on company time - it's got to be on their insurance, and you need to be paid!). Get out on the highway, and through downtown a bit at least, see how it handles.

I've never dealt with a coworker that nasty before, but IMHO, you should not stand for it. Since you've already considered quitting, think of it this way... If you quit, you won't really be able to use this job as a reference, so try to take her down with you (or preferably, get rid of her and keep your job). HR should get rid of her in a second if they find out that their job is getting harder because of her (they have to hire more replacements for the people she makes quit = more work for them). In addition to documenting each instance of harassment as flippedgazelle recommends, it might help to get statements from the personnel who quit recounting their experiences with her. In all likelihood, HR and other supervisors are at least somewhat aware of her manipulations, but they find it easier to ignore her than replace her for now.

The biggest thing is don't let her get to you, remember that no matter what it feels like, you can literally walk out the door at any moment and not look back - just remembering that can help you ignore her... just do a good job, and remember, your focus is on school right now anyway.

Now if you're scared she might go on a shooting rampage, well then all the above rambling is for naught - run!

[Wheatfield]

Whatever you do, do not step outside your comfort zone regarding duties you'll take on.
In your example with the hotel shuttle bus, if there is some sort of in-house training that you are supposed to take prior to operating it and your supervisor told you to operate it when you are not trained on it, that should be grounds for a disciplinary action against the supervisor.
You are not supposed to risk your life, the lives of clients or the lives of innocent third parties because a supervisor wants you to, so even her showing reaction to your refusal to operate the equipment in question should be something to take to management.
She didn't brow beat you into doing something stupid, but the next person she abuses may not be as cool headed.
Gather your ammunition over a period of time.
Document everything, you can rest assured that she is.
If you aren't comfortable talking to her boss because of their relationship, then go above that person's head.
You can rest assured that the hotel owner doesn't want the sort of problems you are pointing out.

As a general rule, a department or business that has a rapid changeover of staff has supervisory problems that need to be addressed by upper management.

[reeftool]

Being forced to a job you are not qualified for is over the line. Driving a shuttle, I am assuming you would be driving hotel guests somewhere, usually requires a special license in most states and if your state doesn't require it I would think the hotels insurance company would require some sort of training. Any accident with an unqualified driver would result in a monster lawsuit. This looks like a classic example of a middle management moron trying to look good by saving the company money not having a higher paid professional driver do the job. If anything happened, you can bet she will hang you out to dry. This is a time when it is necessary to go over her head.

[Rupert]

My friend, this is all too common in the work place, and it goes back as far as I can remember,which is a long time. Remember that old song....no, you're too young, but some will....."The backstabbers...they smile in your face, all the time they're trying to take your place...." Was it Marvin Gaye? Anyhow, here is the problem,..... there is no solution. You just can't win from the bottom up, so you need to find another job. Now I have been here many times in my life, and I am almost 65 now, it went fast...but I can't, no I don't, recall ever being intimidated a time in my entire life. Not once, but I paid the price a good many times. Lost a few jobs when I not only told some jerk where to shove it, but actually assisted them in geting it in there. A few times some big dude whipped my hiney, but I guarantee not a one would a ever want to do it again, it was not without a lot of collateral damage to themselves. I don't advocate this, it must fit your personality, and the fact that you wrote this shows that it is not your style, which is most likely a good thing. Just find another job as soon as possible, and maybe have a little fun on your way out? Life is way too short to allow yourself to be abused. For whatever genes I inherited from my ancestors, I am grateful and abuse has never found a home on my doorstep, but it has been costly at times.
Regards & Good Luck!
Rupert

[LeDave]

remember that no matter what it feels like, you can literally walk out the door at any moment and not look back

Thanks everyone! I think this quote has got to be the one I am going to use for tomorrow for sure! If anything, next time I will just walk right out flat on her face and drive home and she will be stuck there working alone. Good bye! Which I am sure will be tomorrow.

[Ash]

Thanks everyone! I think this quote has got to be the one I am going to use for tomorrow for sure! If anything, next time I will just walk right out flat on her face and drive home and she will be stuck there working alone. Good bye! Which I am sure will be tomorrow.

That may also be what she wants, and unless you don't like nor need the job, or you can get another/a better job elsewhere reasonably quickly, I'd be careful about exercising your pride and walking away. That could send the message that you don't care much for the job (even though you do).

She would be worth confronting with the question of 'why', as mentioned earlier? And see if she avoids the confrontation or tackles it head on. The former response would be harder to manage than the latter, but it's worth a go.

If you enjoy the job (without her), it may be something worth sticking around for - or if there's no hope of her making work more pleasant for you, or leaving herself, it may be an idea to get something lined up before walking away...

[LeDave]

Well I didn't show up for work yesterday. I just completely let that skip by. Then today my manager called and wow! She said she know that I didn't come in for work yesterday and that if it has something to do with my supervisor and I, she could change that so I would work with other people. And that she really wants me to still come in and work and she's sorry that she didn't know what was going on until a few other people told her. I was really shocking because she was full of empathy. I told her that I was sorry that I didn't come in for work yesterday and I still want to come in to work and I love to work there, and I would be glad to have my schedule changed so that I could work with other people instead.

Everything worked so well all the sudden, I was surprised my manager talked to me the way she did. I wasn't expecting her to be this nice and understanding to me. I thought I was just going to be a goner for sure.

[reeftool]

I hope things work out for you. I might mention that just walking out may not always be the answer although if you only worked there a couple of weeks it probably isn't even worth mentioning on your resume. In a situation like you were in, I would let the upper management know why I was leaving. The president of the last company I worked for, and I still would be but they left NY State, used to say that people didn't quit companys, they quit managers. He always wanted to know why someone was leaving.