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02-22-2010, 11:57 PM   #1
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Ken Rockwell Facts

Ken Rockwell Facts

Found in various places on the internet.

* Ken Rockwell is the Chuck Norris of photography

* Ken Rockwell's camera has similar settings to ours, except his are: P[erfect] Av[Awesome Priority Tv[Totally Awesome Priority] M[ajestic]

* Ken Rockwell doesn't color correct. He adjusts your world to match his.

* Sure, Ken Rockwell deletes a bad photo or two. Other people call these Pulitzers.

* Ken Rockwell doesn't adjust his DOF, he changes space-time.

* Circle of confusion? You might be confused. Ken Rockwell never is.

* Ken Rockwell doesn't wait for the light when he shoots a landscape - the light waits for him.

* Ken Rockwell never flips his camera in portrait position, he flips the earth

* Ken Rockwell ordered an L-lens from Nikon, and got one.

* Ken Rockwell is the only person to have photographed Jesus; unfortunately he ran out of film and had to use a piece of cloth instead.

* When Ken Rockwell brackets a shot, the three versions of the photo win first place in three different categories

* Before Nikon or Canon releases a camera they go to Ken and they ask him to test them, the best cameras get a Nikon sticker and the less good get a Canon sticker

* Once Ken tested a camera, he said I cant even put Canon on this one,thats how Pentax was born

* Rockwellian policy isn't doublethink - Ken doesn't even need to think once

* Ken Rockwell doesn't use flash ever since the Nagasaki incident.

* Only Ken Rockwell can take pictures of Ken Rockwell; everyone else would just get their film overexposed by the light of his genius

* Ken Rockwell wanted something to distract the lesser photographers, and lo, there were ducks.

* Ken Rockwell is the only one who can take self-portraits of you

* Ken Rockwell's nudes were fully clothed at the time of exposure

* Ken Rockwell once designed a zoom lens. You know it as the Hubble SpaceTelescope.

* When Ken unpacks his CF card, it already has masterpieces on it.

* Rockwell portraits are so lifelike, they have to pay taxes

* On Ken Rockwell's desktop, the Trash Icon is really a link to National Geographic Magazine

* Ken Rockwell spells point-and-shoot "h-a-s-s-e-l-b-l-a-d"

* When Ken Rockwell went digital, National Geographic nearly went out of business because he was no longer phyically discarding photos

* For every 10 shots that Ken Rockwell takes, 11 are keepers.

* Ken Rockwell's digital files consist of 0's, 1's AND 2's.

* Ken Rockwell never focus, everything moves into his DoF

* Ken Rockwell's shots are so perfect, Adobe redesigned photoshop for him: all it consists of is a close button.

* The term tripod was coined after his silhouette

* Ken Rockwell never produces awful work, only work too advanced for the viewer

* A certain braind of hig-end cameras was named after people noticed the quality was a lot "like a" rockwell

* Ken Rockwell isn't the Chuck Norris of photography; Chuck Norris is the Ken Rockwell of martial arts.

* Ken Rockwell never starts, he continues

02-23-2010, 01:04 AM   #2
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and an antidote to ^^^

The Fake Ken Rockwell’s Blog
02-23-2010, 01:38 AM   #3
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QuoteOriginally posted by ecnal Quote
and an antidote to ^^^

The Fake Ken Rockwell’s Blog
Looks very similar to Fake Chuck Westfall's blog
02-23-2010, 03:27 AM   #4
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By curiosity, I looked at his portfolio.

I own a decent amount of photography books and, living in Paris, I have the chance to be able to attend a fair number of master photograph expositions.

I have paid little attention to Ken Rockwell since I started photography. I only knew that he had a hudge impact in photographic nerd microcosm on the web. So I can say that I'm not biased over him.

Now, how I can put it. His pictures are postcards at best, snapshots most often. Technicaly they are ok, but to put it simply, they don't have any artistic impact, the composition is almost never strong, nothing happen in his pictures.

I know about landscape photography, portrait, fashion, street and more experimental movements, I won't say that I'm at the level of an experienced curator however, but clearly there's nothing to brag about in those pictures.

02-23-2010, 07:59 AM   #5
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I'm new to photography, got my first DSLR about 5 years ago, and I have seen Ken Rockwell at every photo club meeting I have ever been to, every photo event or contest I have ever been to, every Froum I have ever been a member of, or just lurked on, including this one. Ken Rockwell comes in all shapes and sizes, all colors, and encompasses all creeds and religions. He is never any different in any setting, his work is always the "final word" and there is no question concerning photography that he can't answer. Amazingly, he is often the majority of any gathering of photographers, in the real world or here on the internet.......sometimes he can be on the same site in different spots all at once....dozens of times. I once was at an event where every person present was Ken....
If there is any one group of people that have a larger ego problem than photographers, I haven't seen it. Golfers? Nah, they can't get away with it, there is that problem of a scorecard....Bowlers....same problem.....Race car drivers......ditto. But, give a person a camera, and in no time at all they are Ken Rockwell. Go see how many you can find .......he is here in good supply.
Regards!
02-23-2010, 08:04 AM   #6
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I think he is the Paris Hilton of photography. He is famous for being famous.
02-23-2010, 08:20 AM   #7
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Some of his articles would be all right...were the Arsehole Factor removed from them.

On a page about film, he'll go on about his RealRAW™ philosophy, blah, blah, blah. proper photogs shoot slide, etc, etc. Then, navigate over a page about a particular Nikon D-something, and, suddenly, no one should bother with it, with cameras like this there's no reason to shoot film, etc, etc.

Keep in mind, he's not a pro or anything. Well, he used to shoot pictures for some university magazine or something. But it's the general smugness that gets me - "This is what I shoot, how I shoot it, anything else is for dickheads."
02-23-2010, 08:36 AM   #8
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Oh my God I can't stop laughing!!!

02-23-2010, 08:50 AM   #9
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QuoteOriginally posted by Rupert Quote
I'm new to photography, got my first DSLR about 5 years ago, and I have seen Ken Rockwell at every photo club meeting I have ever been to, every photo event or contest I have ever been to, every Froum I have ever been a member of, or just lurked on, including this one. Ken Rockwell comes in all shapes and sizes, all colors, and encompasses all creeds and religions. He is never any different in any setting, his work is always the "final word" and there is no question concerning photography that he can't answer. Amazingly, he is often the majority of any gathering of photographers, in the real world or here on the internet.......sometimes he can be on the same site in different spots all at once....dozens of times. I once was at an event where every person present was Ken....
If there is any one group of people that have a larger ego problem than photographers, I haven't seen it. Golfers? Nah, they can't get away with it, there is that problem of a scorecard....Bowlers....same problem.....Race car drivers......ditto. But, give a person a camera, and in no time at all they are Ken Rockwell. Go see how many you can find .......he is here in good supply.
Regards!
You know Rupert I used to take you seriously, then I realised you were just taking the pee, and now I'm having to take you seriously again. I think there is a bit of Ken Rockwell in all of us and we can only move on when we recognise this truth and cast out that demon. The UK equivalent was/is Joe Cornish but at least he uses a proper LF camera although I can never get myself to bow down before his alter either.

Still, if it keeps the bread on his table then who are we to get all superior?
02-23-2010, 09:02 AM   #10
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QuoteOriginally posted by justinr Quote
You know Rupert I used to take you seriously, then I realised you were just taking the pee, and now I'm having to take you seriously again. I think there is a bit of Ken Rockwell in all of us and we can only move on when we recognise this truth and cast out that demon. The UK equivalent was/is Joe Cornish but at least he uses a proper LF camera although I can never get myself to bow down before his alter either.

Still, if it keeps the bread on his table then who are we to get all superior?

Well,you are certainly wise if you don't take a lot of my BS too seriously, no argument there! Of course, there are always exceptions, sometimes.... just like the blind hog.....there is always "sometimes".

As for the Ken Rockwell thing, I find it disgusting, self admiring, and ridiculous....and I see it it many photographers at times....including myself, and anyone that is familiar with my "work" knows that I am just a plain and simple amateur. It is back to that scorecard which limits your success to math...but we don't have such a thing and can deceive ourselves...and sometimes others....with just a lot of self adoration. I think it is not as much a flaw as it is just human nature. Only a bad trait....in someone else! LOL!
Regards!
02-23-2010, 09:20 AM   #11
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QuoteOriginally posted by Rupert Quote
................. and anyone that is familiar with my "work" knows that I am just a plain and simple amateur. ................
Most of us here are amateurs. I don't know about you, but I see the professional photographer's job being that of taking pictures to please someone else. My purpose as an amateur is to take pictures that please me. If others like them, so much the better but if not; oh well.
02-23-2010, 09:45 AM   #12
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QuoteOriginally posted by Parallax Quote
Most of us here are amateurs. I don't know about you, but I see the professional photographer's job being that of taking pictures to please someone else. My purpose as an amateur is to take pictures that please me. If others like them, so much the better but if not; oh well.
That is a healthy attitude, and one I share. I know when I have a great shot, which is not too often, and at those times find my self satisfaction adequate. However, being human, I do like a little praise once in a while....I think that is universal. Mostly, it all has to be fun for me, and usually is. I love all aspects of photography, just as I love warring here on this Forum! Great fun, if you don't take it too seriously!

You can tickle my ego here, if so desired, but not much will help me in my winter depression. This was last week, and unfortunately, it is looking this way again this morning....after a fantastic 75F on Sunday. I hate the winter!
Regards!
In front of my house...an uncommon sight in Central Texas. I was surprised that the Rokinon 8MM Fisheye delivered this well.
02-23-2010, 09:49 AM   #13
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Nice shot. Looks a little like here only not nearly so deep. As for that 75 degree thing, no sympathy here. We haven't seen 75 degrees since early October.
02-23-2010, 11:23 PM   #14
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Now that you guys have added to the fame of Ken Rockwell, be sure to go by his web site and make $5 donation. He has a family to raise.

Edit: In other words, K.R. is a semi-professional version of Rice Low with a better bed side manner.
02-23-2010, 11:26 PM   #15
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QuoteOriginally posted by Parallax Quote
Most of us here are amateurs. I don't know about you, but I see the professional photographer's job being that of taking pictures to please someone else. My purpose as an amateur is to take pictures that please me. If others like them, so much the better but if not; oh well.
Oh I really REALLY like that! Seriously!

Pat
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