why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)

Joel B · 12-28-2013, 01:05 PM

Word of caution: Don't ruin a good thread by mocking religion. I don't want to see this die because of bad feelings! Now back to the fun!!

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 01:24 PM

Originally posted by monochrome

My outdoor Tabby - acquired as a kitten from the Ralston Purina test farm to solve a mouse problem - lived for 18 years on a diet of rodents and the occasional helping of rice and cooked chicken. He usually slept in the house but we had to call him in at bedtime. We'd holler, "CAAAAT!!" out the back door and within a minute he'd trot up the steps and into the kitchen. We never really knew where in the house he slept, but we never had mice in that house again. We think they just decided when the cat moved in the neighborhood changed and they all sold and moved out at the same time.

Strangely, he was dog-like and loyal and owned - I mean OWNED - our yard and the dog (as I've written) was a dope. He once tried to filch a helping of rice and chicken from the cat's bowl. Have you ever watched a cat beat the snot out of a dog three weight classes up?

My wife looked at the idiot and said, "Serves 'ya right, dummy."

Hah, sounds like Tabby is related to my felines. Granted, we do not live in a farm, but in a house with a garden. While the felines (all 3 of them) have a strong sense of property, they really do want to go out only for three reasons: (i) their human is going outdoor, and they need to keep an eye on him, (ii) there's another creature, not member of the clan, in *their* garden, and (iii) there's something that'd make for a good meal out there.

When we moved in, the former owner of the house had a big dog, something that looked like an oversized bull-dog and ran about 25-30 Kg or so (none of the felines are more than 5Kg, and they were adolescents then). Well, on the day we transferred ownership and got the keys, the feline overlords were along (of course) and had easily understood that this now was *their* property...poor bull-dog spending a couple of hours, literally paralyzed, on the roof of the former owners car, with 3 fierce felines keeping watch, while we did the paperwork, got a tour, and had a drink..... I think that the bull-dog was a really smart cookie, he'd have been served as lunch had he dared wiggle an ear....

Anecdote aside, we do not have enough rodents to keep them fed on that alone, but they do run of a 90% all-natural diet (raw chicken/beef, yes, with bones and such).......they also do have developed a certain skill of catch-bird-when-in-low-flight in the summer. According to their vet, they're in an amazing shape and health (they get full blood-work annually), with the Feline-in-chief having a physique appearing 4-6 years younger than what is usual for a city-cat....we hope that this means that she'll be with us for a loooong time.

For the record, I've never seen anyone trying to steal food out of any of my felines bowls, so I do not know what would happen. An unsuspecting visitor (family member) once moved the feline-in-chief's bown whilst there was food in it, and got punched in the eye (literally!) for it. Not scratched, punched yielding a good black-eye. Who knew that cats could do that....

Some things in a feline household are really, really just above the pay-grade of mere humans.

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 01:28 PM

Originally posted by Ex Finn.

Didn't know it was green

Well, I do guess that depending on what language you use, that becomes either "blue cheese" or "green cheese". If you look carefully, it indeed is more green than it is blue.

Either way, it's delicious - on bread, or in as a pizza topping (with slow-grilled onions, mozarella, and a little bit of jalapeño).

Bonus-point is, that adding Roquefort cheese to a dish makes the domestic felines loose interest in it quickly

**monochrome** · 12-28-2013, 01:43 PM

Originally posted by tclausen

Some things in a feline household are really, really just above the pay-grade of mere humans.

Tears of laughter are literally running down my cheeks.

Parallax · 12-28-2013, 02:16 PM

Originally posted by Joel B

Word of caution: Don't ruin a good thread by mocking religion. I don't want to see this die because of bad feelings! Now back to the fun!!

Probably good advice.

**jatrax** · 12-28-2013, 03:10 PM

Well, I briefly strayed over to one of the "rumors" threads, the one about the FA Limiteds. After reading a page and a half my stomach acid increased to the point I had to medicate. So, I left and came back here. Funny how a thread about not buying Pentax makes me feel good about buying Pentax but a thread about buying Pentax stuff makes me want to throw up.

It's like the rumor section is a "negativity trap", maybe it is sucking in all the negativity in the world and allowing the rest of us to continue life blissfully unaware of how quickly Ricoh is destroying Pentax.

Sorry for the rant. And back off topic: we had mac and cheese for dinner last night. My wife makes the best mac and cheese on the planet. (IMHO) She also has a recipe for mac & cheese with Dungeness Crab in it, but we just had the plain cheesy kind last night.

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 03:12 PM

Originally posted by jatrax

Well, I briefly strayed over to one of the "rumors" threads, the one about the FA Limiteds. After reading a page and a half my stomach acid increased to the point I had to medicate. So, I left and came back here. Funny how a thread about not buying Pentax makes me feel good about buying Pentax but a thread about buying Pentax stuff makes me want to throw up.

It's like the rumor section is a "negativity trap", maybe it is sucking in all the negativity in the world and allowing the rest of us to continue life blissfully unaware of how quickly Ricoh is destroying Pentax.

Sorry for the rant. And back off topic: we had mac and cheese for dinner last night. My wife makes the best mac and cheese on the planet. (IMHO) She also has a recipe for mac & cheese with Dungeness Crab in it, but we just had the plain cheesy kind last night.

This thread seems to be all but negative, what with bunnies and waffles and felines - and now mac & cheese. Btw., on behalf of everybody in the thread, I believe that we need proof that your wife makes the best on the planet, and are awaiting receiving our invitations at the earliest...

**jatrax** · 12-28-2013, 03:20 PM

Originally posted by tclausen

I believe that we need proof that your wife makes the best on the planet,

We live in a really small town and she makes a point of making sure she spreads her baked goods around, (fire department, dentist, doctor, etc.) So at my last checkup the doctor starts in on me about my weight and cholesterol. I said "you do know who my wife is right?" He said "Oh right, never mind"

**monochrome** · 12-28-2013, 03:36 PM

So I'm watching some Red Bull nut job running a mountain bike down a 1500 foot elevation drop, STEEP course, doing backflips, 50 foot drops, gut-busting aerials - with a GoPro on his helmet. And he laughs at the end.

We are such wusses.

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 03:41 PM

Originally posted by jatrax

We live in a really small town and she makes a point of making sure she spreads her baked goods around, (fire department, dentist, doctor, etc.) So at my last checkup the doctor starts in on me about my weight and cholesterol. I said "you do know who my wife is right?" He said "Oh right, never mind"

Ehh....I really think that there's no way I can make a meaningful contribution to this, without incurring either your wrath, your wifes, or both....

...I might get away offending your physician in the process also.

So, "no comments"...?

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 03:45 PM

Originally posted by monochrome

So I'm watching some Red Bull nut job running a mountain bike down a 1500 foot elevation drop, STEEP course, doing backflips, 50 foot drops, gut-busting aerials - with a GoPro on his helmet. And he laughs at the end.

We are such wusses.

Hey, speak for yourself, monochrome....some of us laugh in the face of wusses doing backflips on a mountain-bike down a moderate hill.

**THoog** · 12-28-2013, 04:03 PM

I once laughed in the general direction of a guy who had just done a forward flip on a mountain bike, face-first into a creek - but only after asking if he was okay.

**Ex Finn.** · 12-28-2013, 04:14 PM

Hey, we used to ride ice-floats down the river, dressed in 6mm neoprene wet-suits. The first 30 seconds after getting in to the water was a B***R. Could have caught some good footage if there had been Go-Pros back them.
Having some Mac&Cheese with grilled chicken for dinner tonight BTW.

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 04:19 PM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by Ex Finn.

Hey, we used to ride ice-floats down the river, dressed in 6mm neoprene wet-suits. The first 30 seconds after getting in to the water was a B***R. Could have caught some good footage if there had been Go-Pros back them.
Having some Mac&Cheese with grilled chicken for dinner tonight BTW.

I have a friend as crazy as you...he'll go ice-diving in a wetsuit. He's also from Finland. I'm not sure exactly how you guys do it, but I guess that it has something to do with a circulatory system genetically tailored for a very low hemoglobin content, replaced by...some liquid with a lower freezing point...

(I'm originally from Scandinavia, but I still believe that the Finish have a gene favoring tolerance-to-cold that us Scandinavians ain't got...)

tclausen · 12-28-2013, 04:20 PM

Originally posted by tclausen

I have a friend as crazy as you...he'll go ice-diving in a wetsuit. He's also from Finland. I'm not sure exactly how you guys do it, but I guess that it has something to do with a circulatory system genetically tailored for a very low hemoglobin content, replaced by...some liquid with a lower freezing point...

(I'm originally from Scandinavia, but I still believe that the Finish have a gene favoring tolerance-to-cold that us Scandinavians ain't got...)

By the way, the topic of this thread is to see how far off-topic we can take it before a moderator discovers and closes it down, right? In that case, this discussion is highly on-topic in its off-topicness.....

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12-28-2013, 01:05 PM	#2161
Joel B Veteran Member Join Date: Aug 2013 Location: Barnett MO. Photos: Albums Posts: 2,336	Word of caution: Don't ruin a good thread by mocking religion. I don't want to see this die because of bad feelings! Now back to the fun!!

12-28-2013, 01:24 PM	#2162
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by monochrome My outdoor Tabby - acquired as a kitten from the Ralston Purina test farm to solve a mouse problem - lived for 18 years on a diet of rodents and the occasional helping of rice and cooked chicken. He usually slept in the house but we had to call him in at bedtime. We'd holler, "CAAAAT!!" out the back door and within a minute he'd trot up the steps and into the kitchen. We never really knew where in the house he slept, but we never had mice in that house again. We think they just decided when the cat moved in the neighborhood changed and they all sold and moved out at the same time. Strangely, he was dog-like and loyal and owned - I mean OWNED - our yard and the dog (as I've written) was a dope. He once tried to filch a helping of rice and chicken from the cat's bowl. Have you ever watched a cat beat the snot out of a dog three weight classes up? My wife looked at the idiot and said, "Serves 'ya right, dummy." Hah, sounds like Tabby is related to my felines. Granted, we do not live in a farm, but in a house with a garden. While the felines (all 3 of them) have a strong sense of property, they really do want to go out only for three reasons: (i) their human is going outdoor, and they need to keep an eye on him, (ii) there's another creature, not member of the clan, in their garden, and (iii) there's something that'd make for a good meal out there. When we moved in, the former owner of the house had a big dog, something that looked like an oversized bull-dog and ran about 25-30 Kg or so (none of the felines are more than 5Kg, and they were adolescents then). Well, on the day we transferred ownership and got the keys, the feline overlords were along (of course) and had easily understood that this now was their property...poor bull-dog spending a couple of hours, literally paralyzed, on the roof of the former owners car, with 3 fierce felines keeping watch, while we did the paperwork, got a tour, and had a drink..... I think that the bull-dog was a really smart cookie, he'd have been served as lunch had he dared wiggle an ear.... Anecdote aside, we do not have enough rodents to keep them fed on that alone, but they do run of a 90% all-natural diet (raw chicken/beef, yes, with bones and such).......they also do have developed a certain skill of catch-bird-when-in-low-flight in the summer. According to their vet, they're in an amazing shape and health (they get full blood-work annually), with the Feline-in-chief having a physique appearing 4-6 years younger than what is usual for a city-cat....we hope that this means that she'll be with us for a loooong time. For the record, I've never seen anyone trying to steal food out of any of my felines bowls, so I do not know what would happen. An unsuspecting visitor (family member) once moved the feline-in-chief's bown whilst there was food in it, and got punched in the eye (literally!) for it. Not scratched, punched yielding a good black-eye. Who knew that cats could do that.... Some things in a feline household are really, really just above the pay-grade of mere humans.

12-28-2013, 01:28 PM	#2163
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by Ex Finn. Didn't know it was green Well, I do guess that depending on what language you use, that becomes either "blue cheese" or "green cheese". If you look carefully, it indeed is more green than it is blue. Either way, it's delicious - on bread, or in as a pizza topping (with slow-grilled onions, mozarella, and a little bit of jalapeño). Bonus-point is, that adding Roquefort cheese to a dish makes the domestic felines loose interest in it quickly

12-28-2013, 01:43 PM	#2164
monochrome Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Working From Home Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 26,276	Originally posted by tclausen Some things in a feline household are really, really just above the pay-grade of mere humans. Tears of laughter are literally running down my cheeks.

12-28-2013, 02:16 PM	#2165
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	Originally posted by Joel B Word of caution: Don't ruin a good thread by mocking religion. I don't want to see this die because of bad feelings! Now back to the fun!! Probably good advice.

12-28-2013, 03:10 PM	#2166
jatrax Site Supporter Join Date: May 2010 Location: Washington Cascades Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 12,991	Well, I briefly strayed over to one of the "rumors" threads, the one about the FA Limiteds. After reading a page and a half my stomach acid increased to the point I had to medicate. So, I left and came back here. Funny how a thread about not buying Pentax makes me feel good about buying Pentax but a thread about buying Pentax stuff makes me want to throw up. It's like the rumor section is a "negativity trap", maybe it is sucking in all the negativity in the world and allowing the rest of us to continue life blissfully unaware of how quickly Ricoh is destroying Pentax. Sorry for the rant. And back off topic: we had mac and cheese for dinner last night. My wife makes the best mac and cheese on the planet. (IMHO) She also has a recipe for mac & cheese with Dungeness Crab in it, but we just had the plain cheesy kind last night.

12-28-2013, 03:12 PM	#2167
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by jatrax Well, I briefly strayed over to one of the "rumors" threads, the one about the FA Limiteds. After reading a page and a half my stomach acid increased to the point I had to medicate. So, I left and came back here. Funny how a thread about not buying Pentax makes me feel good about buying Pentax but a thread about buying Pentax stuff makes me want to throw up. It's like the rumor section is a "negativity trap", maybe it is sucking in all the negativity in the world and allowing the rest of us to continue life blissfully unaware of how quickly Ricoh is destroying Pentax. Sorry for the rant. And back off topic: we had mac and cheese for dinner last night. My wife makes the best mac and cheese on the planet. (IMHO) She also has a recipe for mac & cheese with Dungeness Crab in it, but we just had the plain cheesy kind last night. This thread seems to be all but negative, what with bunnies and waffles and felines - and now mac & cheese. Btw., on behalf of everybody in the thread, I believe that we need proof that your wife makes the best on the planet, and are awaiting receiving our invitations at the earliest...

12-28-2013, 03:20 PM	#2168
jatrax Site Supporter Join Date: May 2010 Location: Washington Cascades Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 12,991	Originally posted by tclausen I believe that we need proof that your wife makes the best on the planet, We live in a really small town and she makes a point of making sure she spreads her baked goods around, (fire department, dentist, doctor, etc.) So at my last checkup the doctor starts in on me about my weight and cholesterol. I said "you do know who my wife is right?" He said "Oh right, never mind"

12-28-2013, 03:36 PM	#2169
monochrome Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Working From Home Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 26,276	So I'm watching some Red Bull nut job running a mountain bike down a 1500 foot elevation drop, STEEP course, doing backflips, 50 foot drops, gut-busting aerials - with a GoPro on his helmet. And he laughs at the end. We are such wusses.

12-28-2013, 03:41 PM	#2170
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by jatrax We live in a really small town and she makes a point of making sure she spreads her baked goods around, (fire department, dentist, doctor, etc.) So at my last checkup the doctor starts in on me about my weight and cholesterol. I said "you do know who my wife is right?" He said "Oh right, never mind" Ehh....I really think that there's no way I can make a meaningful contribution to this, without incurring either your wrath, your wifes, or both.... ...I might get away offending your physician in the process also. So, "no comments"...?

12-28-2013, 03:45 PM	#2171
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by monochrome So I'm watching some Red Bull nut job running a mountain bike down a 1500 foot elevation drop, STEEP course, doing backflips, 50 foot drops, gut-busting aerials - with a GoPro on his helmet. And he laughs at the end. We are such wusses. Hey, speak for yourself, monochrome....some of us laugh in the face of wusses doing backflips on a mountain-bike down a moderate hill.

12-28-2013, 04:03 PM	#2172
THoog Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: North Carolina Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 3,685	I once laughed in the general direction of a guy who had just done a forward flip on a mountain bike, face-first into a creek - but only after asking if he was okay.

12-28-2013, 04:14 PM	#2173
Ex Finn. Site Supporter Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Southern Maryland. Espoo. Kouvola. Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 7,975	Hey, we used to ride ice-floats down the river, dressed in 6mm neoprene wet-suits. The first 30 seconds after getting in to the water was a B***R. Could have caught some good footage if there had been Go-Pros back them. Having some Mac&Cheese with grilled chicken for dinner tonight BTW.

12-28-2013, 04:19 PM - 1 Like	#2174
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by Ex Finn. Hey, we used to ride ice-floats down the river, dressed in 6mm neoprene wet-suits. The first 30 seconds after getting in to the water was a B***R. Could have caught some good footage if there had been Go-Pros back them. Having some Mac&Cheese with grilled chicken for dinner tonight BTW. I have a friend as crazy as you...he'll go ice-diving in a wetsuit. He's also from Finland. I'm not sure exactly how you guys do it, but I guess that it has something to do with a circulatory system genetically tailored for a very low hemoglobin content, replaced by...some liquid with a lower freezing point... (I'm originally from Scandinavia, but I still believe that the Finish have a gene favoring tolerance-to-cold that us Scandinavians ain't got...)

12-28-2013, 04:20 PM	#2175
tclausen Veteran Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 1,397	Originally posted by tclausen I have a friend as crazy as you...he'll go ice-diving in a wetsuit. He's also from Finland. I'm not sure exactly how you guys do it, but I guess that it has something to do with a circulatory system genetically tailored for a very low hemoglobin content, replaced by...some liquid with a lower freezing point... (I'm originally from Scandinavia, but I still believe that the Finish have a gene favoring tolerance-to-cold that us Scandinavians ain't got...) By the way, the topic of this thread is to see how far off-topic we can take it before a moderator discovers and closes it down, right? In that case, this discussion is highly on-topic in its off-topicness.....