why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)

**monochrome** · 02-08-2016, 05:46 PM - **1 Like**

Pepper mash, vinegar and salt. MMmmmmmm.

Parallax · 02-08-2016, 05:50 PM

Originally posted by monochrome

Pepper mash, vinegar and salt. MMmmmmmm.

I agree, but the particular pepper used is important.
Actually, I like Tabasco Sauce on things that have mild flavors of their own; eggs, veggies, etc.
Anything of substance requires real peppers.

normhead · 02-08-2016, 05:52 PM

Tess dropped a few of those Taiwanese peppers into a soup she made this week. I don't recommend it.

My mouth burns for a half hour after lunch.

Rupert · 02-08-2016, 05:59 PM

Originally posted by Parallax

Believe it or not, some people in these parts refer to ketchup as "hot sauce".

Now that is hilarious!

...and sounds a lot like Mrs Rupert!

normhead · 02-08-2016, 06:03 PM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by Parallax

I agree, but the particular pepper used is important.
Actually, I like Tabasco Sauce on things that have mild flavors of their own; eggs, veggies, etc.
Anything of substance requires real peppers.

We use mostly Frank's Hot Sauce, and we use it pretty much like Ketchup. Tess hates ketchup. We both hate bland.

Rupert · 02-08-2016, 06:03 PM

Originally posted by normhead

My mouth burns for a half hour after lunch.

Milk stops the burning.....fairly fast......dairy products like cheese do the job too...but strangely, Velveeta doesn't help at all?

How to Stop Mouth Burn From Hot Peppers | eHow

Parallax · 02-08-2016, 06:08 PM

Originally posted by normhead

We use mostly Frank's Hot Sauce, and we use it pretty much like Ketchup. Tess hates ketchup. We both hate bland.

I love Frank's! That's my "ketchup". Frank's isn't very hot, but it's really flavorable and I love the acidity.

Rupert · 02-08-2016, 06:08 PM

Originally posted by normhead

We use mostly Frank's Hot Sauce, and we use it pretty much like Ketchup. Tess hates ketchup. We both hate bland.

This is some pretty delicious stuff and is not too hot. Has a delicious flavor!

Parallax · 02-08-2016, 06:10 PM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by Rupert

Milk stops the burning.....fairly fast......dairy products like cheese do the job too...but strangely, Velveeta doesn't help at all?

How to Stop Mouth Burn From Hot Peppers | eHow

"Dairy products like cheese do the job, but Velveeta doesn't."
Heloooooo. Doesn't that tell you something?

**monochrome** · 02-08-2016, 06:11 PM

Originally posted by Parallax

I agree, but the particular pepper used is important.
Actually, I like Tabasco Sauce on things that have mild flavors of their own; eggs, veggies, etc.
Anything of substance requires real peppers.

My scalp perspires just looking at those photos you put up last week.

normhead · 02-08-2016, 06:16 PM - **1 Like**

Tess checks the top of my bald head looking for sweat beads, to know if she's made something that's too hot.

Parallax · 02-08-2016, 06:18 PM

Parallax · 02-08-2016, 06:21 PM - **1 Like**

Originally posted by monochrome

My scalp perspires just looking at those photos you put up last week.

You need to try some of this: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0084B8Z90/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1454980789&sr=8...1eL
It's not gimmicky "let's add some capsicum to make it hotter" sauce. It's peppers, vinegar, and spices, but it will make your socks roll up and down.

**monochrome** · 02-08-2016, 06:23 PM

'What's That Stuff?' From Chemical and Engineering News.

"For the record, Velveeta is pasteurized process cheese spread and Velveeta Light is pasteurized process cheese product. Cheez Whiz is labeled as pasteurized process cheese sauce, although that type isn't noted in the Code of Federal Regulations. A Kraft spokeswoman confirms that the word "sauce" just seems to be an add-on."

normhead · 02-08-2016, 06:33 PM

The relevant information.

Quote:

Pasteurized process cheese, for example, is made from one or more cheeses, such as cheddar or colby, and may have cream or anhydrous milkfat added. The cheese is blended and heated with an emulsifier—typically a sodium or potassium phosphate, tartrate, or citrate—and other optional ingredients such as water, salt, artificial color, and spices or other flavorings.

Pasteurized process cheese food is a variation of process cheese that may have dry milk, whey solids, or anhydrous milkfat added, which reduces the amount of cheese in the finished product. It must contain at least 51% of the cheese ingredient by weight, have a moisture content less than 44%, and have at least 23% milkfat.

Pasteurized process cheese spread is a variation on cheese food that may contain a sweetener and a stabilizing agent, such as the polysaccharide xanthan gum or the Irish moss colloid carrageenan, to prevent separation of the ingredients. The cheese must be spreadable at 70 F, contain 44 to 60% moisture, and have at least 20% milkfat.

So then in short Velveeta is 51% cheese mixed with an emulsifier, such as sodium or potassium phosphate, tartrate, or citrate, which can be up to 49% of the mix. So that settles it, Velveeta is 51% cheese, or half cheese if you round it off. It would be almost as accurate to call it "emulsifier" as it is to call it cheese.

"Pass the sodium phosphate... yum."

That settles it, Velveeta is not cheese, it's more like half cheese, and half undetermined other stuff that could be damn near anything.

02-08-2016, 06:23 PM	#23339
monochrome Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Working From Home Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 26,276	Yikes!!! 'What's That Stuff?' From Chemical and Engineering News. "For the record, Velveeta is pasteurized process cheese spread and Velveeta Light is pasteurized process cheese product. Cheez Whiz is labeled as pasteurized process cheese sauce, although that type isn't noted in the Code of Federal Regulations. A Kraft spokeswoman confirms that the word "sauce" just seems to be an add-on."

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
why I will buy a K3	chicagojohn	Pentax K-3 & K-3 II	80	09-18-2016 08:42 AM
Suggestion Neutralize the 'why I won't buy a k-3' thread	crewl1	Site Suggestions and Help	61	10-04-2014 05:08 PM
Why I Won't Be Buying A K5IIs	Racer X 69	Pentax K-5 & K-5 II	40	02-03-2014 08:12 PM
Why I don't buy Pentax lenses	keyser	Pentax SLR Lens Discussion	44	12-20-2012 01:58 AM
I feel so old: 8 things the facebook gen won't buy	Nesster	General Talk	27	04-22-2012 11:01 AM

02-08-2016, 05:46 PM - 1 Like	#23326
monochrome Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Working From Home Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 26,276	Pepper mash, vinegar and salt. MMmmmmmm.

02-08-2016, 05:50 PM	#23327
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	Originally posted by monochrome Pepper mash, vinegar and salt. MMmmmmmm. I agree, but the particular pepper used is important. Actually, I like Tabasco Sauce on things that have mild flavors of their own; eggs, veggies, etc. Anything of substance requires real peppers.

02-08-2016, 05:52 PM	#23328
normhead Pentaxian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Near Algonquin Park Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 40,451	Tess dropped a few of those Taiwanese peppers into a soup she made this week. I don't recommend it. My mouth burns for a half hour after lunch.

02-08-2016, 05:59 PM	#23329
Rupert Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 25,123	Originally posted by Parallax Believe it or not, some people in these parts refer to ketchup as "hot sauce". Now that is hilarious! ...and sounds a lot like Mrs Rupert!

02-08-2016, 06:03 PM - 1 Like	#23330
normhead Pentaxian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Near Algonquin Park Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 40,451	Originally posted by Parallax I agree, but the particular pepper used is important. Actually, I like Tabasco Sauce on things that have mild flavors of their own; eggs, veggies, etc. Anything of substance requires real peppers. We use mostly Frank's Hot Sauce, and we use it pretty much like Ketchup. Tess hates ketchup. We both hate bland.

02-08-2016, 06:03 PM	#23331
Rupert Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 25,123	Originally posted by normhead My mouth burns for a half hour after lunch. Milk stops the burning.....fairly fast......dairy products like cheese do the job too...but strangely, Velveeta doesn't help at all? How to Stop Mouth Burn From Hot Peppers \| eHow

02-08-2016, 06:08 PM	#23332
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	Originally posted by normhead We use mostly Frank's Hot Sauce, and we use it pretty much like Ketchup. Tess hates ketchup. We both hate bland. I love Frank's! That's my "ketchup". Frank's isn't very hot, but it's really flavorable and I love the acidity.

02-08-2016, 06:08 PM	#23333
Rupert Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Texas Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 25,123	Originally posted by normhead We use mostly Frank's Hot Sauce, and we use it pretty much like Ketchup. Tess hates ketchup. We both hate bland. This is some pretty delicious stuff and is not too hot. Has a delicious flavor!

02-08-2016, 06:10 PM - 1 Like	#23334
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	Originally posted by Rupert Milk stops the burning.....fairly fast......dairy products like cheese do the job too...but strangely, Velveeta doesn't help at all? How to Stop Mouth Burn From Hot Peppers \| eHow "Dairy products like cheese do the job, but Velveeta doesn't." Heloooooo. Doesn't that tell you something?

02-08-2016, 06:11 PM	#23335
monochrome Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Working From Home Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 26,276	Originally posted by Parallax I agree, but the particular pepper used is important. Actually, I like Tabasco Sauce on things that have mild flavors of their own; eggs, veggies, etc. Anything of substance requires real peppers. My scalp perspires just looking at those photos you put up last week.

02-08-2016, 06:16 PM - 1 Like	#23336
normhead Pentaxian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Near Algonquin Park Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 40,451	Tess checks the top of my bald head looking for sweat beads, to know if she's made something that's too hot.

02-08-2016, 06:18 PM	#23337
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332

02-08-2016, 06:21 PM - 1 Like	#23338
Parallax Senior Moderator Loyal Site Supporter Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Dakota Photos: Gallery Posts: 19,332	Originally posted by monochrome My scalp perspires just looking at those photos you put up last week. You need to try some of this: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0084B8Z90/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1454980789&sr=8...1eL It's not gimmicky "let's add some capsicum to make it hotter" sauce. It's peppers, vinegar, and spices, but it will make your socks roll up and down.

02-08-2016, 06:33 PM	#23340
normhead Pentaxian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Near Algonquin Park Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 40,451	The relevant information. Quote: Pasteurized process cheese, for example, is made from one or more cheeses, such as cheddar or colby, and may have cream or anhydrous milkfat added. The cheese is blended and heated with an emulsifier—typically a sodium or potassium phosphate, tartrate, or citrate—and other optional ingredients such as water, salt, artificial color, and spices or other flavorings. Pasteurized process cheese food is a variation of process cheese that may have dry milk, whey solids, or anhydrous milkfat added, which reduces the amount of cheese in the finished product. It must contain at least 51% of the cheese ingredient by weight, have a moisture content less than 44%, and have at least 23% milkfat. Pasteurized process cheese spread is a variation on cheese food that may contain a sweetener and a stabilizing agent, such as the polysaccharide xanthan gum or the Irish moss colloid carrageenan, to prevent separation of the ingredients. The cheese must be spreadable at 70 F, contain 44 to 60% moisture, and have at least 20% milkfat. So then in short Velveeta is 51% cheese mixed with an emulsifier, such as sodium or potassium phosphate, tartrate, or citrate, which can be up to 49% of the mix. So that settles it, Velveeta is 51% cheese, or half cheese if you round it off. It would be almost as accurate to call it "emulsifier" as it is to call it cheese. "Pass the sodium phosphate... yum." That settles it, Velveeta is not cheese, it's more like half cheese, and half undetermined other stuff that could be damn near anything.