Nature Mandarin sequence

Darrell Raw · 07-31-2013, 03:21 PM

Please critique this sequence:

Any and all comments welcome, while I kind of like this set, I can see there's plenty of room for improvement.

1. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm
2. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm
3. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm
4. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm
5. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm
6. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm

jimH · 07-31-2013, 04:59 PM

Originally posted by Darrell Raw

Please critique this sequence:

Any and all comments welcome, while I kind of like this set, I can see there's plenty of room for improvement.

1. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm
2. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm
3. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm
4. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm
5. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm
6. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm

I really like these photos. Great color and focus. Your are making good use of the fine sensor on that camera!

**Miguel** · 07-31-2013, 06:02 PM

First, this doesn't appear to be a sequence to me, that is, a series of shots with a visually logical beginning and end. You may have taken them in this order, but they appear random. I would not quite consider it a set either in that 2 & 3, and 4 & 5 are redundant. I'm not trying to play semantic games here as sequences have substance in photographic presentations and sets can be used to comprise exhibitions.

These ducks are very photogenic and lots of fun to shoot. All of your shots have them totally centered with their frames, and that can be fatiguing on the eyes with multiple shots. Ducks are often in motion and you lose their natural grace by centering them this way repeatedly.

No. 1 shows less of the more interesting parts of the duck when shot from the perspective of its trailing edge, so this is least interesting.

No. 2 has out of focus foreground vines etc right in the way, which brings down the shot.

No. 3 is one of the strongest but the tone is underwhelming. The color balance seems too blue; it also seems a bit under exposed (excepting the glarey ripples) and believe it or not it lacks vibrance. The shadows also need to be better rendered. I think it is possible to cool down the ripples and lighten up the remaining components of the image. Also consider some negative clarity + sharpening to take the edge off the lighting yet keep the feather textures. I'd probably clone out the vertical sticks if I was not too busy one day.

No. 4 has a great posture, but the feeling is a bit too claustrophobic with all those branches in such a tight frame. I'd tone down the lighting on the duck as well.

No. 5 feel redundant.

No. 6 I like a lot as well. I'd cool the highlights and add some yellow to the white balance. You've got some kind of vignetting going on that I find rather pleasing, but I'd up the midrange some in the whole image. The sticks in counterpoint are a really nice touch. I'd also consider using significant negative clarity and minor sharpening.

Hope this helps.

M

Darrell Raw · 08-01-2013, 04:56 AM

Originally posted by Miguel

First, this doesn't appear to be a sequence to me, that is, a series of shots with a visually logical beginning and end. You may have taken them in this order, but they appear random. I would not quite consider it a set either in that 2 & 3, and 4 & 5 are redundant. I'm not trying to play semantic games here as sequences have substance in photographic presentations and sets can be used to comprise exhibitions.

These ducks are very photogenic and lots of fun to shoot. All of your shots have them totally centered with their frames, and that can be fatiguing on the eyes with multiple shots. Ducks are often in motion and you lose their natural grace by centering them this way repeatedly.

No. 1 shows less of the more interesting parts of the duck when shot from the perspective of its trailing edge, so this is least interesting.

No. 2 has out of focus foreground vines etc right in the way, which brings down the shot.

No. 3 is one of the strongest but the tone is underwhelming. The color balance seems too blue; it also seems a bit under exposed (excepting the glarey ripples) and believe it or not it lacks vibrance. The shadows also need to be better rendered. I think it is possible to cool down the ripples and lighten up the remaining components of the image. Also consider some negative clarity + sharpening to take the edge off the lighting yet keep the feather textures. I'd probably clone out the vertical sticks if I was not too busy one day.

No. 4 has a great posture, but the feeling is a bit too claustrophobic with all those branches in such a tight frame. I'd tone down the lighting on the duck as well.

No. 5 feel redundant.

No. 6 I like a lot as well. I'd cool the highlights and add some yellow to the white balance. You've got some kind of vignetting going on that I find rather pleasing, but I'd up the midrange some in the whole image. The sticks in counterpoint are a really nice touch. I'd also consider using significant negative clarity and minor sharpening.

Hope this helps.

M

All good points, I'll try the suggested changes this weekend. I think I have some crop leeway on the originals to move them off-center. I'll also try cooling the ripples and brightening up the darker areas, some play with light/dark/shadow adjustments in lightroom may do the trick. Thanks!

07-31-2013, 03:21 PM	#1
Darrell Raw Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Surrey Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 134	Mandarin sequence Lens: Sigma 18-250mm HSM DG Macro Camera: Pentax K5 IIS Photo Location: United Kingdom Please critique this sequence: Any and all comments welcome, while I kind of like this set, I can see there's plenty of room for improvement. 1. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm 2. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm 3. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm 4. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm 5. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm 6. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm

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07-31-2013, 04:59 PM	#2
jimH Veteran Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: South Central Nebraska - USA Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,771	Originally posted by Darrell Raw Please critique this sequence: Any and all comments welcome, while I kind of like this set, I can see there's plenty of room for improvement. 1. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm 2. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm 3. f6.3, 1/200, ISO 800, 250mm 4. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm 5. f6.3, 1/125, ISO 800, 250mm 6. f6.3, 1/250, ISO 800, 250mm I really like these photos. Great color and focus. Your are making good use of the fine sensor on that camera!

07-31-2013, 06:02 PM	#3
Miguel Site Supporter Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Near Seattle Photos: Gallery Posts: 2,743	First, this doesn't appear to be a sequence to me, that is, a series of shots with a visually logical beginning and end. You may have taken them in this order, but they appear random. I would not quite consider it a set either in that 2 & 3, and 4 & 5 are redundant. I'm not trying to play semantic games here as sequences have substance in photographic presentations and sets can be used to comprise exhibitions. These ducks are very photogenic and lots of fun to shoot. All of your shots have them totally centered with their frames, and that can be fatiguing on the eyes with multiple shots. Ducks are often in motion and you lose their natural grace by centering them this way repeatedly. No. 1 shows less of the more interesting parts of the duck when shot from the perspective of its trailing edge, so this is least interesting. No. 2 has out of focus foreground vines etc right in the way, which brings down the shot. No. 3 is one of the strongest but the tone is underwhelming. The color balance seems too blue; it also seems a bit under exposed (excepting the glarey ripples) and believe it or not it lacks vibrance. The shadows also need to be better rendered. I think it is possible to cool down the ripples and lighten up the remaining components of the image. Also consider some negative clarity + sharpening to take the edge off the lighting yet keep the feather textures. I'd probably clone out the vertical sticks if I was not too busy one day. No. 4 has a great posture, but the feeling is a bit too claustrophobic with all those branches in such a tight frame. I'd tone down the lighting on the duck as well. No. 5 feel redundant. No. 6 I like a lot as well. I'd cool the highlights and add some yellow to the white balance. You've got some kind of vignetting going on that I find rather pleasing, but I'd up the midrange some in the whole image. The sticks in counterpoint are a really nice touch. I'd also consider using significant negative clarity and minor sharpening. Hope this helps. M

08-01-2013, 04:56 AM	#4
Darrell Raw Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Surrey Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 134 Original Poster	Originally posted by Miguel First, this doesn't appear to be a sequence to me, that is, a series of shots with a visually logical beginning and end. You may have taken them in this order, but they appear random. I would not quite consider it a set either in that 2 & 3, and 4 & 5 are redundant. I'm not trying to play semantic games here as sequences have substance in photographic presentations and sets can be used to comprise exhibitions. These ducks are very photogenic and lots of fun to shoot. All of your shots have them totally centered with their frames, and that can be fatiguing on the eyes with multiple shots. Ducks are often in motion and you lose their natural grace by centering them this way repeatedly. No. 1 shows less of the more interesting parts of the duck when shot from the perspective of its trailing edge, so this is least interesting. No. 2 has out of focus foreground vines etc right in the way, which brings down the shot. No. 3 is one of the strongest but the tone is underwhelming. The color balance seems too blue; it also seems a bit under exposed (excepting the glarey ripples) and believe it or not it lacks vibrance. The shadows also need to be better rendered. I think it is possible to cool down the ripples and lighten up the remaining components of the image. Also consider some negative clarity + sharpening to take the edge off the lighting yet keep the feather textures. I'd probably clone out the vertical sticks if I was not too busy one day. No. 4 has a great posture, but the feeling is a bit too claustrophobic with all those branches in such a tight frame. I'd tone down the lighting on the duck as well. No. 5 feel redundant. No. 6 I like a lot as well. I'd cool the highlights and add some yellow to the white balance. You've got some kind of vignetting going on that I find rather pleasing, but I'd up the midrange some in the whole image. The sticks in counterpoint are a really nice touch. I'd also consider using significant negative clarity and minor sharpening. Hope this helps. M All good points, I'll try the suggested changes this weekend. I think I have some crop leeway on the originals to move them off-center. I'll also try cooling the ripples and brightening up the darker areas, some play with light/dark/shadow adjustments in lightroom may do the trick. Thanks!