Actually, the "same light" question get's a bit tricky. The T-stop indicates how much light is actually getting to the sensor. A lens with a lot of elements and coatings that absorb light will have a "slower" T-Stop at the same f-stop compared to a simpler lens with no coatings. More info here:
F-Stops vs T-Stops - What are they? and when do you use them? - DIY Photography
It is approximately true, though. F-stop is a reasonable indicator and they should be about the same. The "hole" (aperture), is the same diameter for all lenses for a given focal length and f-stop.
Now onto the third topic, about how fast lenses are not valuable. A "good" lens is better at any aperture than a "worse" lens. Mostly, really good lenses are also at least a little bit fast. The 50/1.8 will probably be sharper and give more pleasing photos than any zoom lens at 50mm. Whether it is "worth it" is a purely aesthetic and budget based question. Of course the 50mm f2.8 macro will be sharper than the 50/1.8 also, so this case the "slower" lens is "better", though there are other compromises when you start using macro lenses for every day shooting (focus hunting being the worst one).
The important thing is to buy a lens that accomplishes the goals you have for photography. If you have a 1080 monitor and don't pixel peep and don't print large, then no, you won't ever see the difference in "better" lenses. If you look at your shots on a 4k monitor and pixel peep and print very large, then yes, you will see the difference.