People Wrapped Up

jzietman · 04-19-2010, 01:01 AM

If I remember correctly, this is HP5+ pushed to ISO 3200 in Rodinal.

Last edited by jzietman; 12-16-2010 at 09:03 PM.

jct us101 · 04-19-2010, 01:03 AM

I'm not sure what you really want me to critique on here. It's great in a Henry Cartier Bresson like way, but in a technical view, it's got a lot wrong with it. You can't see your subjects and the light in the background is way too harsh and distracting, and the blur from everything is also very annoying. I do like it though.

jzietman · 04-19-2010, 01:25 AM

Well, you referenced Henri Cartier-Bresson in your critique, so I'm in a pretty good mood!

I'll try to scan the print I have, I think it looks very different. Of course, it still has the same blurriness, but I think it's less harsh, which might be better. I rarely get results on the computer like I do in the darkroom, though negative scans are sometimes irresistibly detailed. I really see what you mean about the harshness here, though, and I'll try to clean that up when I get a chance.

Tuner571 · 04-19-2010, 10:27 AM

I'm sorry but this photo really has alot wrong with it and it just doesn't do it for me. For one it is very blurry and a lot of the detail is gone. There is also a great amount of noise in the image which hurts the sharpness even more. Also, as jst said the light in the background is really annoying as well, is it the moon or streetlight I'm not really sure?

jzietman · 04-19-2010, 01:49 PM

It's a streetlight. The noise I'm pretty sure is actually film grain (this is scanned film), but I could play with reducing that. I usually keep whatever grain my film has, it's never really crossed my mind to remove it!

I hear you on the out of focus issue, though. It's a chronic issue, as a few of my uploaded shots show.

jct us101 · 04-19-2010, 02:56 PM

But I referenced Henri-Cartier Bresson so don't worry about it too much. Honestly I'm not really that sure how someone could mistake that streetlight for the moon, and I still like this photo, although it's not technically perfect.

**rparmar** · 04-20-2010, 05:53 PM

I disagree vehemently with all of the above. So fixated on the technical are these rabid posters! Critique by the numbers.

This is a very good image pushing towards being a great image, a piece of magic. Maybe it is not quite there. Maybe it was an accident. But I would have been happy to take it.

In fact, I am staring at it again. It captures my eye. Not my critical eye, but my inner eye.

But let me try to be more formal. Let's see. It's got a subject. A girl looks at her mobile. She is wrapped in a sheet or some other cloth. It doesn't matter what it is, so we cannot tell what it is: that is perfect.

She is out of focus, out of touch, relying on a small piece of technology for comfort, for human contact. Is she cold? Or is the blanket there for a deeper, emotional purpose?

We see her face clearly. She is intent on her communion with this small plastic object. Beside her, draped in darkness, is another person. A friend? A random passer-by? We have no idea. There is no social sphere that encompasses both of these people; they are isolated. In fact, the presence of a second person in the frame emphasises the singularity of the first.

Above our subject is a burnt out hole where her life should be. Where the sun should be. Where the moon should be. But we don't know which (if any) of these it is. It hangs there like a dead promise.

There are some strange filaments that drift up to it from either side in the darkness. Is it is the puppeteer for these figures? Or are their souls being leached upwards into the bright white void?

This is the best photo I have seen in a long time. Thank you so much.

jzietman · 04-20-2010, 10:54 PM

Thank you, rparmar, that really means a lot to me.

04-19-2010, 01:01 AM	#1
jzietman Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Salem, MA / New York City, NY Posts: 224	Wrapped Up Lens: 55mm Camera: Pentax Spotmatic II ISO: 3200 If I remember correctly, this is HP5+ pushed to ISO 3200 in Rodinal. Last edited by jzietman; 12-16-2010 at 09:03 PM.

04-19-2010, 01:03 AM	#2
jct us101 Veteran Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Rohnert Park, CA Posts: 3,793	I'm not sure what you really want me to critique on here. It's great in a Henry Cartier Bresson like way, but in a technical view, it's got a lot wrong with it. You can't see your subjects and the light in the background is way too harsh and distracting, and the blur from everything is also very annoying. I do like it though.

04-19-2010, 01:25 AM	#3
jzietman Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Salem, MA / New York City, NY Posts: 224 Original Poster	Well, you referenced Henri Cartier-Bresson in your critique, so I'm in a pretty good mood! I'll try to scan the print I have, I think it looks very different. Of course, it still has the same blurriness, but I think it's less harsh, which might be better. I rarely get results on the computer like I do in the darkroom, though negative scans are sometimes irresistibly detailed. I really see what you mean about the harshness here, though, and I'll try to clean that up when I get a chance.

04-19-2010, 10:27 AM	#4
Tuner571 Veteran Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Ohio Photos: Gallery \| Albums Posts: 1,549	I'm sorry but this photo really has alot wrong with it and it just doesn't do it for me. For one it is very blurry and a lot of the detail is gone. There is also a great amount of noise in the image which hurts the sharpness even more. Also, as jst said the light in the background is really annoying as well, is it the moon or streetlight I'm not really sure?

04-19-2010, 01:49 PM	#5
jzietman Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Salem, MA / New York City, NY Posts: 224 Original Poster	It's a streetlight. The noise I'm pretty sure is actually film grain (this is scanned film), but I could play with reducing that. I usually keep whatever grain my film has, it's never really crossed my mind to remove it! I hear you on the out of focus issue, though. It's a chronic issue, as a few of my uploaded shots show.

04-19-2010, 02:56 PM	#6
jct us101 Veteran Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Rohnert Park, CA Posts: 3,793	But I referenced Henri-Cartier Bresson so don't worry about it too much. Honestly I'm not really that sure how someone could mistake that streetlight for the moon, and I still like this photo, although it's not technically perfect.

04-20-2010, 05:53 PM	#7
rparmar Site Supporter Join Date: Jan 2008 Photos: Gallery Posts: 8,819	I disagree vehemently with all of the above. So fixated on the technical are these rabid posters! Critique by the numbers. This is a very good image pushing towards being a great image, a piece of magic. Maybe it is not quite there. Maybe it was an accident. But I would have been happy to take it. In fact, I am staring at it again. It captures my eye. Not my critical eye, but my inner eye. But let me try to be more formal. Let's see. It's got a subject. A girl looks at her mobile. She is wrapped in a sheet or some other cloth. It doesn't matter what it is, so we cannot tell what it is: that is perfect. She is out of focus, out of touch, relying on a small piece of technology for comfort, for human contact. Is she cold? Or is the blanket there for a deeper, emotional purpose? We see her face clearly. She is intent on her communion with this small plastic object. Beside her, draped in darkness, is another person. A friend? A random passer-by? We have no idea. There is no social sphere that encompasses both of these people; they are isolated. In fact, the presence of a second person in the frame emphasises the singularity of the first. Above our subject is a burnt out hole where her life should be. Where the sun should be. Where the moon should be. But we don't know which (if any) of these it is. It hangs there like a dead promise. There are some strange filaments that drift up to it from either side in the darkness. Is it is the puppeteer for these figures? Or are their souls being leached upwards into the bright white void? This is the best photo I have seen in a long time. Thank you so much.

04-20-2010, 10:54 PM	#8
jzietman Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Salem, MA / New York City, NY Posts: 224 Original Poster	Thank you, rparmar, that really means a lot to me.