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Forum: Pentax K-3 1 Hour Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Maybe.
Forum: Pentax K-3 1 Hour Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Leave out the marshmallows and I'm all over it.
Forum: Pentax K-3 1 Hour Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Well I did.
Forum: Pentax K-3 1 Hour Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
You need this Bob.



Meat and cheese trail mix.
Forum: Pentax K-3 2 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Did I mention that I have also used those shoes Jivass Slippers while skydiving? They are very aerodynamic and the soles provide good traction when jumping out the door of the jump plane.
Forum: Pentax K-3 2 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
I have a vegetable salad for a meal nearly every day. Lettuce, celery, carrots, red, yellow, orange and green bell pepper, mushrooms, scallions, cucumber, olives, some nuts (I rotate through pecans, walnuts, slivered almonds, sunflower seeds), shredded Romano or Parmesan cheese, ginger salad dressing.

Sometimes Mrs. Racer 2.0 sears some prawns or fish to put on top. Other days she slices a steak up in thin strips, seasons and sears it, to top the salad.

Tasty!

Healthy.

Did I mention I am losing weight?

Yeah, buddy.
Forum: Pentax K-3 2 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
The following was written by humorist Dave Barry, and appeared in his column in the Miami Herald, February 22, 2008 (note that his doctor uses a much longer (15,000 feet longer) camera on a hose):


Dave Barry
A journey into my colon ó and yours
Colonoscopy Journal:

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.

A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.

Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.

I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'

I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later, for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America's enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.

Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.

Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons). Then you have to drink the whole jug.

This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.'

This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.

The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that?

Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep.

At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode.

You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point.

Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.

There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.

'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea.

Really.

I slept through it.

One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that IT was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors.

I have never been prouder of an internal organ.
Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
Why I will buy a K-3 III
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 112
Views: 4,801
A light year is a long time.

As for video on a DSLR, I wish it was an option, rather than standard equipment.

I would be perfectly happy with a full frame DSLR that didn't have video. Make it smaller and lighter, and lower the cost a bit.
Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
I only need a left shoe at the moment. Probably be June before I put a shoe back on the right foot again.
Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
I have used my race driving shoes while jumping out of perfectly good airplanes.
Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
The Hokas will do just fine.

I also don't don lycra when I bike. Jeans and a t-shirt, ball cap and sunglasses. Ice cold adult malted barley pops in a cooler pack in one saddle bag, snacks and lunch in the other.

There are a few of those reclaimed railroad grade bike paths around here. Makes for a nice sunny Sunday ride with Mrs. Racer 2.0.

Sometimes I will find a trail in the woods too, provided it isn't overrun with the mountain biking crowd.
Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
It is my understanding that they used to do them while the patient is awake, but sedated some here too. But for some reason they decided to put the patient down.

Might have something to do with shoving a camera on the end of a 2000 foot hose into something that for most of us is an Exit Only.

I've had 4, all while "in that other place".

The gastroenterologist is sending me "we miss you" cards again. I guess they want to do another Exploration Southwest again.
Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
I wear these when I work.





I wear these when I drive my race car.






I like these when I hike.






I wear these when paddling my kayak around. Designed to get wet and then drain, they are comfortable and make a day on the river even more enjoyable.






We don't wear shoes in the house, but the doctor wants me in decent and supportive footwear all the time (save for those obvious times when one's feet are without footwear). So I wear these inside the house.

Forum: Pentax K-3 4 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
I'm OK with the needles, when they are needed, but would rather they weren't needed. It is the sting of the stick that I don't like. I have spent my entire life trying to get used to it and just let it happen when it is needed, but it still bothers me.

When I first started at the electric utility, way back when, he local blood bank would come around 3 or 4 times a year. My coworkers encouraged me to donate. After all, it was on company time. They finally shamed me into it, and I became a regular donor.

I finally called it quits after clearing the 3 gallon mark. It was getting tough for them to find a decent vein, and a couple times it wouldn't flow well.

Maybe I was running low.
Forum: Pentax K-3 5 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Don't leave out those who are mia, and Norm & Monochrome pop in now and again.

Then there is Joel.

Remember Joel?
Forum: Pentax K-3 9 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
There.

I fixed it so y'all don't have to turn your monitor, laptop, stoopit phon on its side.

Time to go take a pill.

And Racer sez BFN!
Forum: Pentax K-3 9 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Yesterday, at about 7am I lost all reference to what day of the week it is.
Forum: Pentax K-3 9 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Sounds like he is doing well.



That's the thing. Do your best to stay active and fit enough to always do for yourself. Being able to make it through each day without help from others is the goal.

Independence.

Freedom.

Peace.
Forum: Pentax K-3 12 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Again, blame it on the iPod.
Forum: Pentax K-3 13 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
That is too bad Eddie.

We know that one 12 hour time release is better twice a day, for better and safer health (because of the time release and absence of acetaminophen), and for the convenience of only having to manage two doses a day.

With no narcotic hangover.


I hope your dad continues to have a reasonably good quality of life, and has a great many years too!
Forum: Pentax K-3 21 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
That is great that it has given him a better quality of life.

But it is odd that a doctor would keep him on the high dose of acetaminophen long term like that. Just the narcotic by itself, in the extended release form would be a much better choice, with low risk and nearly zero side effects.
Forum: Pentax K-3 21 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Thanks Dave!
Forum: Pentax K-3 21 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
For most of the 20 years I took it the narcotic never caused any issues.

But the last two were awful. Locked up tight no matter what I ate. Asked the doctor what to do, and he wrote a prescription. I told him I wasn't going to take one drug to offset the side effects of another. Went to a "physiatrist" who got me on a program to get off the Oxy.

Been 3 years last Christmas.

Been awesome to not have a physical dependence on medicine.

When I take it like I am doing now, I take a senokot once a day to keep the pipes clear and things moving along.

Life is good.
Forum: Pentax K-3 21 Hours Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
I have had many surgeries over the years, beginning when I was 10.

The nature of the experience has changed over those years.

I donít recall much from that experience 53 years ago, except it was like falling asleep and then waking up an instant later.

Fast forward to me getting my wisdom teeth pulled at 16. Again, the details are somewhat sketchy, but it was like falling asleep, and then waking up an instant later. This time though, the waking up was rather sudden, like awaking with a start, quite forcefully.

My first colonoscopy was a bit different. I had some apprehension going into it. I donít like needles, and when the catheter was inserted into the vein my anxiety level was high. When they applied the anesthesia it felt like I was sinking into water. When I woke up the sensation was similar to that of going under, only in reverse. Weird.

The last two surgical events were pretty tame. I was enjoying the stuff the anesthesiologist gave me to relax. In November I recall going into the operating theater, then waking up. Today I was out before leaving the preop room. The waking up was much like waking up from a really good sleep, only really stoned.

I think that ones attitude going into these things make all the difference in the experience. I try to stay open minded and relaxed, and find that it helps to make it easier to endure.
Forum: Pentax K-3 1 Day Ago  
why I won't buy a k3 (Warning: Satire Thread)
Posted By Racer X 69
Replies: 64,520
Views: 2,231,010
Many thanks Rod!
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